I've been reading for a year since my oneitis but due to my current living circumstances I can't really practice or try to meet any girls right now. I usually have one social outing a month on average a few hours away.

I get too obsessed with this shit and my lack of experience and have made sex/women into this mythical unattainable goal. I've been to escorts to lose my V and get some experience but the experiences were dire and made me unable to get a boner most of the time.

I have plenty of other shit to work and focus on (work, hobbies, fitness, study) but it all seems very hollow and pointless. I just think about my oneitis daily and how I nearly got laid with her. I just want to stop caring about any and all of this shit and go back to enjoying life. What is my issue?