Hi ladies, as the title says I need some motivation!

I have been planning to leave my live-in partner for a few months now, but this weekend I was visiting my parents and had a breakdown. I started thinking about my relationship and being without him and I just started balling. I am not happy with him, however, spending so much time with someone has me dreading all of a sudden being without him (and in these moments only nice things pop-up in my head).

We have been together almost 10 years now (we are both turning 30 this year) and have lived together for 4. It has been terrible (he is messy, does not clean and all he does is play video-games when he is not working). I have always wanted a family but have been foreseeing a life of bitterness if I stay with him. I know I would be expected to do everything while he plays his video games and we go 50/50 on bills.

A few months ago I discovered FDS and a lightbulb went on, I finally had a word for him - LVM. I've written a few reasons for why I want to leave to keep myself on track but every time I come close to ending it, it's like my brain plays me a track of all the good times and the fear of missing him keeps me still.

How did you go about ending your relationship with a long-term lvm? How did you feel before and after?

I'd appreciate any help! xxx