My lease is about to expire, and I can’t afford to renew, is moving abandonment to family home?

sicrm · 2021-02-15T14:05:32+00:00

first thing is to get a lawyer, STD and DNA tests.

your STBXW and her mom have been looking for one and probably wanting to see if you renew before serving.

don’t see any reason to renew this lease on a personal level but on a legal one, you should ask a lawyer.

connect with your family. you don’t have to live with them, but you’ll need support throughout this process.

good luck

LandOnMyFeet · 2021-02-15T14:06:03+00:00

Talk with your attorney. If you can’t afford it you can’t afford it. I can’t see it as abandonment but the courts can get crazy.

Yes you’ll have child support and alimony but figure that amount as now a fixed budget item that you have to work with.

Write everything down, budgets you concerns debt amount why you are making the decisions your making. You want your back up.

Maybe ask her mother to take her in. Tell her why (affordability) document it and move forward.

Make the best deal you can for yourself to live forward.

Definitely talk with your or an attorney. You could probably get that question answered on the freebie 1st call and maybe compare a couple of attorneys answers.

Good luck! Keep us informed.

AirSailer · 2021-02-15T21:13:50+00:00

Luckily you are both young and only married 2 years... Alimony won't last as long.

Don't sign a lease on something you cannot afford. If you have to move out then YOU need some place to keep the kids for half the time. You cannot expect the judge consider you a responsible parent if you move into a place.onky for yourself.

If you have credit cards you need to get them changed so she cannot start running up debt in your name. For example, she moves out and decides she needs new pots/pans, clothes for the kids, etc. If you have shared cards then try to get your name off them... If she's an authorized user on any of cards in your name have her name removed and lock any cards she has. Also change the passwords on the accounts and the secret pass phrases on the accounts so she cannot call and get new cards or change passwords. You don't want to cut her off from all finances, a judge will look down on that, but don't let her put more debt in YOUR name.

You seriously need a lawyer ASAP, don't wait until you need one. Be proactive about everything, including reviewing everything your lawyer writes.

Apprehensive_Brief56 · 2021-02-17T00:18:25+00:00

If you can't afford to keep your family home, then I don't think that you should worry about leaving your family home. What's more important is your overall financial health.

I'd talk to an attorney for a consultation only and explain your deal, that you're probably getting divorced soon, you're over-extended, etc.

If you haven't been served yet but have had 'the talk,' I would start sitting down with her and trying to work out an agreement -- work out an agreement before either of you file.

The number one thing that makes divorce expensive is using lawyers to communicate back and forth to negotiate things that could have *easily* been worked out before filing papers.

I'm assuming you've both concluded that divorce is certain, and that you're planning to file but haven't actually done it yet. If so, ask her to wait just for a few weeks or long enough to work things out, to get your papers and documents in order. And work out as much as absolutely possible your agreement before going to the courts.

Try to settle it with mediation if possible, but if not, then try to make it as uncontested as possible -- try to work out custody, too. That will be hard, but work it out. I would accept any reasonable offer for custody. I would accept any offer for child support and alimony that is reasonable and affordable. Understand that 'affordable' might mean you still have to cut back on a lot of things you normally like to buy -- deal with it. Raising kids is damn expensive (but I'm assuming worth it). Roll with it.

Do NOT use the courts to fight over petty shit. You will both lose, and you will probably lose more.

Title	My lease is about to expire, and I can’t afford to renew, is moving abandonment to family home?
Author	EightRacks
Upvotes	5
Comments	4
Date	February 15, 2021 1:22 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/lkdkgo/my_lease_is_about_to_expire_and_i_cant_afford_to/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/my-lease-is-about-to-expire-and-i-cant-afford-to.817427 https://theredarchive.com/post/817427

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