Women make themselves attractive via makeup and so on. Yet they leave it a mystery to men whether or not their advances would be welcomed. This puts men in a position whereby they simply cannot know if their every advance, from "hello" to a kiss, will or will not be welcomed until they make it. And if the man guesses wrong, there's a penalty. EXAMPLE: I've often heard "harassment" defined as "unwanted advances" but there is no onus on the women to define, and men have no idea how she would define, what is wanted. In PUA. there's a lot of talk about men fearing rejection. I don't think I fear rejection. I think I fear violating boundaries. And it seems unfair to me that the boundaries are not defined. A related frustration is that society tells us women will in fact state their boundaries if asked, but I think this is false. They go out of their way not to so as to leave all "fault" to the man. To be clear, I'm NOT suggesting that women's making themselves attractive renders men free to impose themselves (the classic "her dress was short). Rather, I'm frustrated by womens' lack of signaling permissibility or precisely, womens' going out of their way to render uncertainty. QUESTIONS: Is there a term for this practice by women? Am I alone in my frustration? Is there someone who wrote out my frustration better than me? Thanks!-----EDIT----some great comments. can someone point me toward a better articulation of this phenomenon? And can we make a TERM for it? i think terms help. e.g. the terms Hypergamy and AA/BB were helpful to me. I think this is yet another concept that needs a term so we can think about it better.