My only sister tries to hamster me (and brother). It's depressing and frustrating.

Clauderoughly · 2013-12-29T06:52:39+00:00

She has been told by me (and my brother) point blank multiple times "WE ARE NOT YOUR FUCKING BOYFRIEND. We are not putting up with your shit.

Yet you keep falling for the same bullshit again and again.

She is Lucy and you are Charlie Brown, and she keeps pulling the football away from you.

You want to stop this shit?

Ignore her. When she invites you around, tell her no because she constantly acts like a bitch. She is exploiting the fact you are family to essentially abuse and control you.

The fact that she is family, doesn't change the fact she is a raging bitch. My sister is exactly the same.

You need to punish her bad behavior by denying her ANY sort of attention. Refuse to interact with her until she gets her shit together, and stick to your guns.

wtfiku · 2013-12-29T07:08:34+00:00

The problem here is you keep accepting her apology. She has been wired to the point where she can fuck with you and get away with it.

gg_s · 2013-12-29T07:28:51+00:00

To us men, biological sisters are regarded as beings of equivalent form. We see her as "a female version of us," however our egos focus on the "us" part and gloss over the "female" part. We may share similar biology, but we do not share similar mentality. We are men and she is a woman. She is a woman first and a sister second.

Treat her as a woman first and a sister second. Cut her off. You may righteously revoke time and attention from siblings who disrespect you. Parents and children are excluded, but siblings are fair game.

Family honor is telling you that you must put up with her shit by virtue of kinship. She interprets it differently. She sees family honor as reassurance that you'll always be available because it is your duty as her brother, hence acting like a scathing cunt with impunity. She is mistaken and you must make it clear to her.

[deleted] · 2013-12-29T09:50:48+00:00

When family becomes toxic, you can love them and simultaneously understand that you aren't letting them get involved in your life.

You enable her shitty behavior by giving her so many 100th chances. If you tell her off for being a bitch and explain what she did wrong, and then you come around and act like it's "all good" the next day, her mind can only think "huh well he got over it so... no big deal, I was right, wooooo!"

[deleted] · 2013-12-29T09:01:36+00:00

Being a young woman inflated her ego, as shows with her treatment of gamma boyfriend. Once a person gets supplicanting attention in one circle, they start to carry over the entitlement to other areas of their life.

Here's the truth, nothing you will do will make her come around, she'll just as likely run to the next person she knows she can pull this bullshit on and get away with it. Don't concur with anymore plans either. She has to come to your place when you have time on your terms. Sadly, you'll probably have to wait until she hits the wall. After that, her attitude will improve by bits and pieces, as she tries to salvage together a support network.

RedPillScare · 2013-12-29T16:24:20+00:00

You are treating her like a man. When a man fucks up, you argue, and a day later everything is blown over and cool.

Observe how women fight. They hold grudges for years in some cases, but usually many days.

If you want to effectively correct her behavior, you have to use methods she understands. This is why a soft next is so effective. You're removing your attention long enough that she feels the loss, but not so long that she acclimates to its absence. If she's playing games, change the rules and enforce them.

sideoftheham · 2013-12-29T13:43:42+00:00

My cousin is like this. She has an older and a younger bother and she's married. She acts as if like everybody in the world is there to serve her and it sucks. I don't see her too much since I live in a different country, but every year I hear stories about how she does some hamster like bullshit with people (including my mom).

I think the one who suffers the most is her husband. He doesn't have any family or friends (except for people on his wife's family side). You can tell that he did not know this..."side" of her before he got married and I think that he wouldn't of married her had he of known.

My cousin is also a first time mother. She gave birth around 6 months ago or so, so I think she uses that as an excuse to justify her behavior but yo, I wouldn't be surprised of they get divorced.

Does TRP know of any websites that could help the poor husband? I guess it deals with married life but mostly it ought to be about personal independence.

frequentlywrong · 2013-12-29T11:37:45+00:00

It breaks my heart.

Yeah that's your problem. You have no frame at all. Frame is something you need to maintain in all aspects of your life and all relationships. Family, friendships, professional or romantic. No one will respect you otherwise. This is why guys bust each others balls, they are testing frames. If you lose (get upset), you also lose their respect. There is always rivalry between siblings and your sister is pummeling you in the ground. She hates you because women despise guys without frame no matter what relationship.

Stop throwing the word hamster around like that. You are completely missing the point. The problem is not with her, it's with you. She is acting like a woman. Admittedly a complete bitch. But it's your fault for not being above the situation and in control of yourself. I suppose your father has no frame either, which is why your sister is a raging bitch. She is an emotional kid who was never put in her place which is why she will remain a bitch for the rest of her life.

Zamarski · 2013-12-29T12:03:40+00:00

Wait until her baby rabies kicks in. You will then have much mirth in your life.

Stayinghereforreal · 2013-12-29T13:08:11+00:00

You are putting up with her shit. If you really were not, she would either straighten up PERMANENTLY or you would not speak to her any longer.

mrhelton · 2013-12-29T16:11:00+00:00

My sister is the same exact way, and you know what? I don't talk to her anymore. If she wants to come to me and be friendly (and she does sometimes), then I'm willing to let her in.

If she's going to treat you like a boyfriend, then you should next her like any other girlfriend.

[deleted] · 2013-12-29T16:12:08+00:00

Fuck her shit. Cut all contact with her.

[deleted] · 2013-12-29T16:50:20+00:00

Two options:

ignore her and take away her ability to power play
Build a new patio.

anal_cyst · 2013-12-29T16:56:11+00:00

After I leave town she inevitably gives me a call a few days later to apologize

to which you reply," So how are you going to make it up to me?"

30303030303030 · 2013-12-29T17:53:56+00:00

Her new thing is to "punish" me for some imaginary infraction by canceling on plans (which were usually made by her her last minute) by getting into her car and leaving me behind.

Don't ever make plans with her. If she wants something make her drive to your place. Learn from your mistakes. If you get stood up again it's your fault.

Ignore, ignore, ignore. You must be very young.

[deleted] · 2013-12-29T14:35:57+00:00

The best part about brother sister relationships is the sibling rivalry. Chances are you used to wrestle around when you were younger. Go back to those days. Sweep her legs out from under her, wet Willies, Indian burns, noogies, restrain her and tickle the heel out of her. Physically overpower her. Make sure she knows you can dominate her anytime you'd like. Then in the future, when she starts to go into hamster overdrive, remind her that you will put her in her place.

"I'm leaving..."

"I will pink belly the shit out of you"

When people see this from the outside, and act like they care, just tell them you're brother and sister.

"Oh, ok"

Manuel_S · 2013-12-29T20:04:35+00:00

"Last time you made me lose time. Now you wanna meet? Then you must apologize pretty and make up to me."

Have her jump through a few hoops, and deny her attention until she does.

She will.

Title	My only sister tries to hamster me (and brother). It's depressing and frustrating.
Author	desylid
Upvotes	54
Comments	35
Date	December 29, 2013 5:45 AM UTC (12 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/TheRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/1txc5s/my_only_sister_tries_to_hamster_me_and_brother/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/TheRedPill/my-only-sister-tries-to-hamster-me-and-brother-its.9349 https://theredarchive.com/post/9349

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