Feminists: Men are incapable of "love and intimacy"

Muesli_nom · 2016-10-10T12:34:45+00:00

Oh golly, the Good Men project. If that name doesn't clue you in...

The principal issue this article avoids like the plague is that Feminism has a core tenet of "The Patriarchy" being a thing. A thing that is present in males from birth and can only be overcome by conscious effort to abase oneself. Or to quote the article (boldening by me):

Maybe it’s because because feminism challenges a sense of innate privilege, which has been a part of the masculine identity for centuries, but which is probably just a mask which covers up an underlying male suspicion that the female of the species is in many ways the more powerful…as evidenced by her ability to give birth, her mysterious links with the natural cycles of the moon and her capacity to give or withhold the love and intimacy that we all need.

So there you have it, folks. According to this article, women are mystical fairies, men are sinister schemers. Women are perfect as they are, men need to be changed to even pass as human. For this, women are the teachers, and men just need to sit down and listen. How do you think the Good Men Project got its name? Because if you go by that world view, a good man is never born, he has to be made.

edit: And this is why they can yap about the dictionary definition of feminism all they want - it doesn't make it any more valid as an argument for feminism. Because this core tenet runs counter to anything egalitarian, because it denies equal treatment from the onset. This view of "masculinity" as one of harmful deficiency that has to be done away with informs anything feminists do: From viewing domestic violence as a gendered issue for which men are to blame to enforcing mandatory "don't be a rapist" classes on university for males only to the myth of "women earning less than men for the same work", and on and on, and on. And as long as feminists of all colours and creeds do not understand that the very basis of their world view is prejudiced nonsense, they will continue to be at best useless when it comes to addressing inequality, at worst detrimental.

blueoak9 · 2016-10-10T16:28:17+00:00

"For their part, women can teach us much about how to communicate, to care for others and for ourselves, to love well (and make love well) to respect nature and generally to become healthier, happier and more well-rounded human beings, without giving up any of our essential masculinity."

Honey, it may be possible to learn that from a woman but it will mean more if you learn it from men.

Women do not communicate any more effectively than men do, what differs is the content of what they are communicating, where there is any actual difference. As for the nurturing bit, that stops right before it gets to you; never forget that.

As for respecting nature more, go right now to any drugstore and look in the entire aisle devoted to cosmetics before you babble like that again. In my particular region the last twenty years have seen massive destruction of forested land to build McMansions, and it certainly wasn't the husbands pushing those purchasing decisions.

As for becoming a healthier more well-rounded person, that's your inner work to do. Other people can be important in that but their gender does not come into it. Bottom line: a man does not need a woman to make him a better human being. Take that homophobic crap and set fire to it out back.

HotDealsInTexas · 2016-10-10T17:15:56+00:00

Feminism is defined in my dictionary as: a movement to promote equal rights and equality of opportunity for everyone, regardless of their gender, sexuality, appearance, physical condition, etc.

You can keep saying it all you want: that doesn't make it true. Seriously, enough of this shit. And stop appropriating the issues of other movements, too.

Because women are the largest and most visible group facing an inequality due to their gender, feminism has largely been about their struggles for equality, a process that’s been steadily ongoing since the Suffragettes.

Bullshit. Feminism actively opposes attempts to make men's struggles for equality more visible.

The concept of “equality” incorporates freedom from fear and oppression for everyone, including men; so by definition, a true feminist would support opposing and changing any unfairness that men, as well as women, experience as a result of their gender.

And yet, very few Feminists actually do so.

This would encompass understanding and addressing men’s issues like male suicide, male victims of violence (from a male or a female perpetrator); and men’s limited access to their children; all aspects of inequality that the men’s rights movement accuses feminists of being either indifferent to, or actively encouraging.

Ahh, the good old "No seriously, believe us, we support everything the MRM does," shpiel. Let's come back to this later.

For sure, not all feminists are male-positive, and no doubt those women who are not particularly well disposed towards men have their reasons. But extremists of all kinds, including extreme feminists, are usually best just ignored; and feminism shouldn’t be judged on the basis of the words or actions of a minority of women who have used that platform to advance their own personal agenda rather than the common aim of equality for all.

Translation: the author wants us to just put our fingers in our ears and pretend the "extreme" (read: mainstream) Feminists don't exist. Meanwhile, the mainstream Feminists are busy smearing Men and Men's Rights in the media and enacting anti-male policies in corporations, schools, and governments.

It’s true that a vocal minority of anti-male women have garnered a lot of media attention, and unfortunately many people now mistakenly think that their views represent what feminism is all about.

You know what, I really want to see a fucking poll on this. I keep hearing shit about a "vocal minority" without any proof that the extremists are actually a minority. Take a fucking poll of a huge sample of self-identified Feminists and ask them a bunch of questions testing for anti-male views.

Claiming Feminism isn't an anti-male movement because of this silent majority we never see any evidence of while the vast majority of actual ACTION taken by Feminist groups is either misandrist or exploits cultural misandry for its own purposes is like claiming Islam isn't a misogynist religion while every Muslim-Majority country on the planet legally discriminates against women.

And some men, it seems, have been only too happy to use those views as an excuse to dismiss the whole feminist agenda, possibly because they feel threatened in some way by the idea of female equality.

There's another spot on the bingo card: "And if you don't agree with Feminism that's obviously just because you hate women!"

Maybe it’s because because feminism challenges a sense of innate privilege, which has been a part of the masculine identity for centuries, but which is probably just a mask which covers up an underlying male suspicion that the female of the species is in many ways the more powerful…as evidenced by her ability to give birth, her mysterious links with the natural cycles of the moon and her capacity to give or withhold the love and intimacy that we all need.

In case anyone had anyone's doubts about what the author really believes: remember, he claimed Feminism cares about shit like male suicide... but when pressed, here he is, first claiming men are entitled and privileged, and then going on this borderline vagina cultist rant about how men are just jealous of women's natural superiority.

When feminism is represented as being anti men (a concept most feminists would find absurd) or wanting women to have special privileges, rather than just equality, it’s understandable if any men react defensively by insisting on their own right to be treated fairly as equals with dignity and respect. And men who are the least secure about their male identity, may react with an “attack as a means of defense” by perhaps joining one of the growing number of so-called “Men’s Rights” groups who promote a view of women as enemies of male equality, and as secondary citizens whose role is to cater for the needs, sexual and otherwise, of men.

Just a reminder: groups like GMP do not exist to help men. Their purpose is to keep men under Feminist control, and to derail and undermine groups that DO care about men.

we men urgently need to take a more proactive attitude towards challenging the ingrained attitudes and behavior of a masculine culture,

And there's another tick on the bingo card: Masculinity = Evil.

One very effective way for men to do this is to support what women are trying to achieve with feminism. And according to a feminist friend, the best way men can do that is to “stop being in the way” and instead become women’s allies, at the same time as we work to improve men’s rights

Start of the article: "Feminism helps men!" End of the article: "Sit down and shut up!"

For their part, women can teach us much about how to communicate, to care for others and for ourselves, to love well (and make love well) to respect nature and generally to become healthier, happier and more well-rounded human beings, without giving up any of our essential masculinity.

And remember, men are inherently defective and need a woman to 'fix' them.

Fuck off. My bare minimum for supporting a movement is that, at the very least, it should be capable of attempting to appeal to me without insulting me or treating me as less than human.

2016-10-10T17:16:56+00:00

President Obama’s recent ‘coming out’ as a feminist will hopefully help them get it.

Obama is almost single handedly responsible for the kangaroo courts that our universities have become regarding sexual assault, and he hasn't backed down even after the lawsuits have begun. He is an enemy of men's rights.

This would encompass understanding and addressing men’s issues like male suicide, male victims of violence (from a male or a female perpetrator); and men’s limited access to their children; all aspects of inequality that the men’s rights movement accuses feminists of being either indifferent to, or actively encouraging.

Interesting that you didn't mention false accusations and the presumption of innocence.

fengpi · 2016-10-10T12:08:39+00:00

Yes, feminism is men's best friend! Except they're too stupid and evil to know it. The bastards. I wish they'd die.

BEST FRIEND! YESSIRS!

The dictionary definition? Repeat it, please! MOAR!!!!!11!!!onethousandonehundredeleven!!! One day, it'll cum tru!

NUMBERS2357 · 2016-10-10T17:23:26+00:00

He says this:

The concept of “equality” incorporates freedom from fear and oppression for everyone, including men; so by definition, a true feminist would support opposing and changing any unfairness that men, as well as women, experience as a result of their gender

and then

For sure, not all feminists are male-positive, and no doubt those women who are not particularly well disposed towards men have their reasons.

Now I judge people by their actions, not by what the dictionary says their self-description means. But if feminists, by definition, are in favor of all this great stuff, how could some feminists not be male-positive? It would be a contradiction in terms!

(not to mention acting like "freedom from fear" is some obvious thing everyone can agree on, rather than a good piece of rhetoric that can lead to some terrible shit if taken to its logical conclusion.)

And he says:

It’s true that a vocal minority of anti-male women have garnered a lot of media attention,

It's funny because he lists as a problem:

men’s limited access to their children

People reflexively argue the "oh it's just an extreme fringe minority" and miss the fact that here, the largest feminist organization out there is working against men's access to children. And no remotely comparable org is on the other side. As a simple factual matter, it is not just the minority.

His whole shtick is "oh it's so obvious, if someone just explained it for 30 seconds men would all realize they should be feminists!" And yet this article shows that he hasn't bothered to really understand the other side's arguments.

JestyerAverageJoe · 2016-10-10T20:26:12+00:00

For their part, women can teach us much about how to communicate, to care for others and for ourselves, to love well (and make love well) to respect nature and generally to become healthier, happier and more well-rounded human beings, without giving up any of our essential masculinity.

I've got a better idea:

I'll help the woman down from that pedestal the author has built and stick said pedestal up his ass.

SacredWeapon · 2016-10-10T17:43:45+00:00

Anytime I see someone revert to the dictionary definition in a discussion of a philosophical concept, I think of the motte and bailey doctrine

Tmomp · 2016-10-10T18:23:41+00:00

If you want to cringe at someone who puts women on a pedestal and men in the gutter, read the author's description of himself:

Steve Garrett is a Cardiff (Wales)-based social entrepreneur, writer, poet and musician (aka ‘Stainless Steve www.stainless-steve.me.uk) who has a long -standing interest in men’s issues and is currently involved in several UK Men’s groups. Steve feels like he has made every relationship mistake possible, but has finally learned a few things (from experience and often, from women) and is keen to share them with anyone interested enough to listen. Steve would like to be the kind of ‘concerned older man’ and mentor for young men that he wises he’d had during his misspent youth. Steve set up ‘FeMANism www.femansm.org.uk as an online forum where men could explore together how to achieve liberation from the ‘Man Box’ at the same time as supporting women’s struggle for equal rights and freedom from fear - to the benefit of both genders.

Sad. Putting himself down and women up forces them to look down on him, reinforcing his views. I hope for his sake that he develops a spine or whatever he's lacking.

Offendsthemods · 2016-10-10T23:21:13+00:00

I am. I am incapable of loving a crazy ass femi nazi!

Gragorin · 2016-10-11T00:13:14+00:00

All in all, I don't think it's that bad of a post even though some of the compliments seem sorta back-handed but some things definitely gave me pause like the "more powerful" statement.

ThePigmanAgain · 2016-10-11T00:55:01+00:00

Actually, it's feminists who are incapable of love -- just check out the way Alice Walker treated her own daughter.

Title	Feminists: Men are incapable of "love and intimacy"
Author	JestyerAverageJoe
Upvotes	27
Comments	20
Date	October 10, 2016 11:58 AM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/56rll6/feminists_men_are_incapable_of_love_and_intimacy/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/feminists-men-are-incapable-of-love-and-intimacy.940108 https://theredarchive.com/post/940108

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