Hey Why TRP ?? I am considering to post on the red pill cause I have been lurking in that subreddit for about 2 years now. What I like is that you give advice straight no bullshitting and I believe that's what I need Please redirect me if you think this post should go to another subreddit cause right now I do actually need help Why now?? I was a virgin till I was 25. Yup 12 years fapping. I lost my virginity just cause I came to work in europe. In about 3 years now here I had 2 LTR though it wasn't that long 2 months each. I broke up with both of them cause It wasn't that interesting anymore sex was good but too much of a headache to maintain the relationship and TBH at the time I was cheating on both of them. So much confidence boost that I got lucky a couple of times. When I say I broke up with them it was rather ghosting or cooling of the communication till no more contact. I never actually said girlfriend/boyfriend so it seemed not necessary to say I wanna break up. Focusing on work was my main motive at both times. Am an immigrant here so no work means no visa (both residence and money;)). So what?? Since the start of 2018(btw fuck you 2018) as the sexually frustrated piece of shit that I am, I ended up going to bars clubs and ending the night in strip clubs. I am your typical nice guy crap I wouldn't talk to a girl till am dipsy or let's just say it drunk. Hitting on girls doesn't work anymore so I would be a wallflower in bars and the club get to dance with some girl have some chitchat and then leave without even asking for her number. So what the fuck is the problem?? I became addicted to strippers. Well with most girls you need to do the heavy lifting in the convo and the kino but with those girls you just enjoy the ride. I managed to sleep with 2 of them but at what cost?? This is the 3rd month that I spend my salary in those places. My close friends only know I go out every day of the week they don't know my financial situation and most of them are like me ( shy and nerdy as hell) Last month I tried NoFap and shit didn't work even got me way more frustrated (if I had 0 game before I ended up with - infinity) I am really considering returning my credit cards or hiding them somewhere in the house and going old school with my finances.

I am a pretty proud person so I cannot really ask advice from my friends or family because that would mean explaining in detail how much am a fuckup. What really hurts is the day you go to buy a sandwich for 10 euros and your card gets declined cause you spent 1500 on a stripper. I thought I would never go to a psychiatrist or some community (recovering alcoholic, sex addiction) to seek help but now I am really considering it. At least a community cause the psychiatrist it s going to be the same give some bitch my money so I would feel good. PS money is not the problem I still have money in my trading account and money I lent to a couple of friends What hurts is how it feels to work my ass of day and night to spend a salary in 5 hours. Although it feels good at the time and I would recover from rejections in a bar, it fucks up my confidence further everytime. So today I decided I would have one of two options be a man stop spending money like a fucking ATM and get girls to actually like me for who I am (long shot and needs a lot of time and effort) or go crazy in the trading and whether go rich or go home(literally back home to my parents). Am a fuckup. So any advice would be welcome and please don't give that crap about getting my shit together (gym diet setting a plan for my goals) I am doing all of that and still it hurts to be so fucking stupid some nights. So if there is someone out there who might be in the same situation or went through something similar This is my cry for help (actually crying in front of my computer while writing this shit that no one would read)