I was a victim of domestic violence and I feared my partner lying so much that I allowed myself to get beaten in the head repeatedly with a blunt object rather than defend myself and risk her having bruises on her arms to use to support her lie. I was so afraid of her lying that even when I finally had to call the cops when she trapped me in a closet after both she and her dog attacked me, that I opted not to press charges because I was afraid she would say I had hit her.

Why was I afraid of this? Because she had already lied to her family about this and made me out to be the aggressor even though all the blood, bruises, cuts, and scrapes were on me. In a previous relationship that also featured domestic violence, I was once talked out of pressing charges by a female officer.

The fear of gender bias against men is a powerful thing. It can be debilitating. It should always be taken seriously. We will never have gender equality for women if we don't also have it for men. Equality, by definition, is for all. The popular attitude that members of a historically privileged group should just shut up and take their medicine when they experience bias is dangerous to all and it was certainly dangerous to me.