I'm 3 months out now and a tip I got from a close friend has made it all work little easier. He asked me to think of one question: "how is it getting better?".
The brain by it's nature wants to answer questions and so with this task it sets itself to seeking answers. And it has worked! I hit the gym essentially every day and that has paid off! The attractive age appropriate woman talked to me today in a work out class - like all friendly like that! I am as fit as I have ever been and that has paid off mentally as well!
I am suffering through the unexpected death of a dearest friend and mentor sanely in the comfort of a close circle of mutual friends. It is scarey to think of life without him and I have the good fortune to have a close group to rely on.
I have re-committed to a men's group i belong to to help me keep from wallowing in a 'woe is me' attitude. It is work - work with an immediate payback.
With all the negativity and problems on this sub (as real and relevant as they are) I just want to say to everyone deep in the divorce mire - slog on brother! It gets better!