I want to share with you two of the best dative advice I have ever read. The following excerpt and quote were taken from a paper from my Philosophy class back in college.

The exceprt was written by Prof. Laureen Velasco (If you know who she is you know which University I graduated from) and the quote is from Osho.

This helped me understand the value of loving your time alone first and knowing that you are complete without depending on anyone, is a pre-requisite to a genuine loving relationship with another human being.

I would like to share these because I believe it can help a lot of people here that I see that have not embraced their time alone and expect that happiness and love comes from someone else. In reality, it must first grow and burst within you.

Here it goes:

“Unless one has been keenly aware of, confronted and embraced his aloneness, love is not possible. Many people want love without realizing deep down, what they really want is someone who will take care of them, someone on whom they can depend on or who will depend on them, depending on their hang-up.

Many people want love but many do not realize what they really want is to control or be controlled, depending on their inadequcies. We must, therefore, ask ourselves if we are in a relationship out of strength or out of weakenss. Are we in a relationship to escape from our aloneness? Is our romantic relationship a dance or a wrestling? Is it fulfilling and enriching, or exhausting and debilitating? Does it allow freedom so that one can expand and grow, or does it imprison, limit, and define what one can do?”

And the quote from Osho:

“When you don’t need a person at all, when you are totally sufficient unto yourself. When you can be alone and tremendously happy and ecstatic, then love is possible.

When you are blissful on your own, you don’t want to use anybody. You simply want to share. You have so much... you would like somebody to share it. And you will feel thankful that somebody was ready to recieve.”

Embrace your aloneness.