TRP was originally something I disagreed with (still do kinda) and I looked into just out of morbid curiosity, and bc I always like to put an alternative to my view points. But these last few months with the pandemic and nothing to do I’ve been kinda sucked into it and find it even more interesting

While it may be inherently negative TRP has caused me to be more confident, assertive and has caused me to mentally stand up for myself when I need to. The thing that makes it negative is it’s for narcissist reasons and it’s aimed to manipulate others for self gain

Whenever I’m just out and about and doing something as simple as shopping, if I have the mindset that “bc I believe in some RP ideas, I am better than most people, and just the thought that I am capable of manipulating and even hurting other people (mentally not physically of coarse) makes me feel empowered. It doesn’t mean I will ever go out of my way to try to manipulate or hurt anyone

While I take anything TRP says with a grain of salt, Putting myself over others has resulted in changes for the better.

But after I come home and my narcissist high starts to recede, I start to feel very isolated and empty. It literally feels like a heavy stimulant. And as negative as this may seem, I do see emotion and sympathy and all these non RP things as weak for both men and women, even as a kid I’ve always had that harsh edge in that. But this negativity does give me a boost in confidence that I didn’t have when I just did the whole soft “it’s ok to have emotion”. I tried that shit for the three years I’ve been in college and I barely got anywhere.

Bottom line, I know that RP ideas are unhealthy and to an extent unscientific, but since it temporarily helps and boosts confidence for a few hours that’s the only way I know how to go about things I don’t how I’d make any fast changes with “softer” approaches.