I am decades older than most of you dear ones. I should know better. I DO know better. I left a 10 year, cohabitating for five of those years, emotionally abusive relationship a year ago. I was codependent and he is a narcissist. Trying to heal, trying to forgive myself for being so gullible and forgiving. He reached out a couple nights ago and I KNEW I should ignore, but he told me I needed to let the past be in the past and it set me off. That slimeball abused me for years, and now he's trying to dictate my recovery timetable? I raged at him, and I should have ignored. I gave him the attention he wanted. I'm so incredibly disappointed with myself.

I hope the flare is true, I'm so done allowing that scrote to disturb me. I know better. I am better. He doesn't deserve access to my emotions, the fucking vampire.

Don't be me.