I know I am new to this sub but love the values and ideals y’all subscribe to. It’s taken me a long time to get back to my strong female feminist roots. I have an education, a single mom, a dream job I worked hard for, and while I am not rich I take care of myself and always look to elevate other women around me. I took a significant break from any dating. About a month ago I tried online dating. The man I met checked many boxes, I thought and we hit it off right away. Good family, funny, educated, good job, owned two homes, said he wanted a relationship with the right person and ... 45 never married never had kids. I’m 40 and divorced. We talked about so many different things and there weren’t any signs of love bombing or trauma bonding I thought we just had great chemistry. I told him I wouldn’t sleep with him until we were in a relationship. He asked to date exclusively.... what is the difference between the two? Well, I still said I didn’t want to sleep together. So he introduced me to his friends, we went out in dates and the whole time he’s telling me just be with me, take a chance, you’re what I have been looking for, and lots of kissing affection and words of affirmation. He wanted to take me to meet his family. Welll, one night I had a few too many drinks and like an idiot we sleep together. I was so mad at myself. Mind you he’s saying his feelings for me wouldn’t change if that did happen. Spoiler alert: everything changed. Less communication less affection suddenly he’s not into pda or making plans and had previously said he wanted a woman who talked about their feelings with him bc that was important. So I tel him hey it seems like you’ve pulled back, I thought we were on the same page and now I feel like you have pulled away and I have specific examples This turns into him being shocked and offended I would say that he was giving me mixed messages and why am I needing a title or trying to put a timeline on love.... wait what?! That was not what I was saying. This goes on where I’m regretting opening my mouth and now he think I’m trying to ask him for a commitment but what I was asking was I’m still at the place where we were when we met and now it seems like you pulled back. This was last night. This morning he text a half ass ‘morning’ and I start thinking about this sub. We had plans to go out with his friends tonight. Around lunch he texts me I am going to meet my friends tonight but if you have time on Sunday let me know. Ummmm I just got the uninvite??? On top of that he explains that he needs a break because the convo the night before didn’t sit well with him and He doesn’t do titles and jump into relationships.... but he wanted to date exclusively?! And so I said ok so you’re punishing me for talking about my feelings that you didn’t like? Why wouldn’t you have told me this to my face or at least called? Mind you I am working this weekend meeting with some key closing deals and he knew that. He says: I’m tired and want a night with my friends let me know about Sunday. I did not respond. I know I need to block delete and move on. But I guess my point or advice I’m looking for is it stung bc I wasn’t expecting that. It seemed like the more I talked about what I do the more he pulled away. My bad for drinking too much and the poor decision, but was he just a LVM in disguise or did I blow it by my mistake and how the eff do I stop meeting these Morons. The willingness to just LIE and then flip it on me is strong these days. Would this have happened no matter what, had I made my mistake or not? I feel so stupid. Please go easy on me, I’m new and truly want to level up in this area. I won’t be going on dates any time soon for sure bc I have myself and my kid to worry about but sometimes I just wish there was a way to not waste my time.