My Standards After Finding FDS

ello-motto · 2020-09-22T23:38:45+00:00

No shrinking of myself just to appease a man.
No acceptance of men who don't have great hair, fashion sense and grooming / well-rounded hobbies and interests that are not of an addictive LV nature like gaming.
No acceptance of "unripe" "men" that have low EQ and aren't actively into personal growth/development. (Men who don't have their shit together, who are still "figuring it out", who are wishy washy, who need to be told what to do, can't lead, plan or take charge, emotionally stunted/immature etc.).

Accountabili_Buddy · 2020-09-22T23:16:32+00:00

Ooooo girl that #3 though!! Love it.

I’m not ready to date yet, even a little. But I’m already starting to realize some of my standards. So far, top 3.

Someone Who Challenges Me and Makes Me Big. My whole life I’ve been with men who have made me small. I want a man who is proud of my accomplishments and says encouraging things while pushing me to be even better, without disparaging me.
Someone Who is Attentive. Listens when I speaks. Remembers things that are important to me. Buys me a small gift because I mentioned it once upon a time. Knows what’s going on in my life. Also included in this is an attentive and generous lover.
Someone Who is Gorgeous. I’m pretty and I’m a serious gym go-er. Even when I put on a few pounds I wear it well, though I’m generally within a 10lb range. I care a lot about my skin, my body, my appearance. And I want a man who does the same.... I want him to be just to this side of ~~shallow~~ vain. Go to the gym. Wear sunscreen. Take care of yourself. Six pack not required or even preferred, but damn it I better not be doing all the heavy lifting bc you have noodle arms.

They will probably evolve as I level up and start actually getting ready to look for a relationship again... but that’s what I got so far.

ThrowRA745318 · 2020-09-24T07:01:37+00:00

Doesn't make me diminish myself

Bored of men who say shit like "I love talking to you" or "It's really cool that you are into x" but then their actions don't match up. Bored of men who don't like me mentioning my salary if I make more than them. Bored of conversations where they're just waiting for their turn to talk. I am an intelligent, interesting, successful person and I refuse to feel like I should shut up and be pretty.

Able to maturely debate and compromise

I have spent a long time hand holding partners through emotional conversations, or trying to tease out engagement, or in the latest case - getting the conversation but absolutely no compromise or discussion. I want someone who can maturely talk about their emotions and wants to find a solution/ compromise rather than being the one who "wins"

Must have a plan for what they want in life

I want someone who isn't just waiting for me to come along and fill a void, or who's just bumbling along with no real ambition or interests. I don't want a guy who tells me he's been waiting for a woman to go somewhere, or to do something new, because the keyword there is "a". Not "me", just any woman and I don't want to be responsible for the fulfilment of a man who hasn't worked out what makes him happy beyond whatever girlfriend he has at the time.

Title	My Standards After Finding FDS
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	56
Comments	6
Date	September 22, 2020 2:16 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/ixo87q/my_standards_after_finding_fds/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/my-standards-after-finding-fds.1195026 https://theredarchive.com/post/1195026

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