I've been lurking in this thread for about 9 months. And I finally get it.

I recently ended a friendship with a man I thought I was in love with. We dated briefly a few years ago. We were friends before and were friends after (part of a really close 3-person friend group). Things were mostly fine. We had been especially close over the past year and a half, after our other friend moved away. Neither of us dated anyone because we were so close and spent almost every day together, did everything together. I recently moved a few hours away for work. Shortly thereafter he started dating someone, and I was unreasonably upset. At first I didn't know why, but then realized it was because I still had feelings for him. In talking with him about it, I found out that he also had feelings for me for YEARS since we had dated, when I thought we were just friends.

I was devastated that instead of being honest with me about it and potentially giving us another chance, he decided to move on to someone else. I couldn't believe that he didn't still want to be with me after he knew how I felt, that he still wanted to be with someone else. I was crushed. I couldn't get over it.

Until I realized, from reading all the stories here...men will move heaven and earth for the women who are truly special to them. So why would I spend more than 5 minutes even thinking about someone who told me that they didn't want me?

Fuck that. Fuck him. I'm finally learning to love myself (I thought I already did, but I was so wrong). If someone isn't going to treat me at least as good as I treat myself, I don't want them. If someone isn't going to treat me like the goddess I am, I don't want them.