An unexpected side point of levels up boundaries has been obvious resistance or anger from men (expected) but also anger from women who are not visible pick-mes and whom I know to be very boundaried themselves.

This is surprising to me and even more disappointing to me than push back from men, because male push back I expect.

An example would be: I set boundaries with a male coworker who tried to be a little bit sleazy with me, trying to turn the convo to sex or making comments about his own sex life even when I expressed I didn’t want to hear it- in I think a way that was almost getting off on forcing me to listen. He also obviously wanted to date me as well. I stopped talking to him.

So I have a female acquaintance who is very boundaried and I’m sure would’ve shut any such behavior from a man, especially in a professional atmosphere down immediately, even if it were far less offensive than what I experienced. She’s actually significantly more picky about her boundaries and her space than I am, to the point where it can be somewhat OTT and make assumptions about people’s motives that aren’t there. But I feel while she’s having next level boundaried on things that are areas of grey, and effort is being made to deny me very basic boundaries on things that are quite obviously inappropriate or unacceptable

Rather than seeking to see why this guy and I no longer talked and what he mayve done to merit it- I can tell it was talked around by her as me being a little difficult and nutty. My acting strangely or switching things up with people in a way that was a little bit unstable and not knowing how to maintain relationships- instead of what it was- me shutting something inappropriate down.

It’s strange that I seem to be experiencing versions of this from women who are extremely boundaried and picky themselves about what they allow in their space etc. but are suddenly kind of critical or mocking or assuming of it being a problem with me- when I take the same measures they would’ve immediately taken over far less offensive situations than the ones I was going through.

It’s kind of odd and annoying to me that I’m being painted the villain by women who would’ve themselves set strong boundaries in the situations I was going through and yet I see it in several situations.

It’s a bit strange to me because I thought the most boundaried women in my life would also be most supportive of me developing stronger boundaries too. Wtf

I mean- what would she gain from trying to ridicule or tear down my boundaries all while knowing damn well she never would’ve accepted the behavior either. In fact, she likely would’ve accepted even less of it than I did. Shut it down even quicker at the slightest sign.