Feeling suicidal

gantz_au · 2020-09-01T01:11:10+00:00

Make goals to achieve an exit plan from that life. These aren't people you need in your life, you don't deserve this abuse.

Goals are very important because when you set goals and work toward achieving those goals, it gives yourself a sense of purpose and direction.

There are overall goals and small goal's. Your first overall goal is to become completely independent from your abusive family.

In order to do that, you will need several things. Money and knowledge of how things work in the outside world is key. Make goals that allows you to acquire both of these things and plan them out.

You can also set a time parameter for when you want to achieve this goal. A lot of people like to go by the 5 year plan approach, however, the idea is to take small steps forward and to rely less and less on your abusive family.

Once one set of goals is reached, it'll set you up to be able to achieve more and more.

Don't get me wrong, none of this is easy, life never is for most people. But I can tell you this: it is most definitely worth it.

Tea-Pot · 2020-09-01T00:54:54+00:00

Just hang in there. The most important thing is to keep some hope that things will improve in the future. It also might help to try and find some things to be grateful for... Like, maybe you have to live with shitty parents, but at least you're not homeless...

DiccKickem · 2020-09-01T01:25:24+00:00

Hang in there man. This sounds like a very difficult situation. If your family has no interest in supporting you or caring about you try not to let it get you down and don’t worry about it too much. You’ve put yourself out there and tried to explain to your parents how you feel they are treating you. That’s all you can do.

Try to focus on and spend time doing things you enjoy while focusing on school too. If you don’t have any activities you enjoy doing, get into some form of exercise. It’s hard at first but once you get into it, it’s very enjoyable and rewarding. Personally, whenever I’m feeling really down or having a bad day, going and blowing off some steam in the gym or on the bike really clears my head and I feel better. Seeing yourself steadily improve at something and achieve personal goals is very rewarding and something to be proud of. Exercise is an activity where improvement is recognized quickly.

Above all else, do something you enjoy every day. Merely slaving through whatever work you have and dealing with and worrying about family problems every day will crush anyone. Find an outlet and keep on going.

FairlyWhelmed · 2020-09-01T01:11:03+00:00

For a couple of years now I've been left feeling unwanted by my parents.

Cousin, I'm so sorry you are going through this pain.

Unfortunately I've fell back into suicidal thoughts which I thought I'd gotten rid of completely.

Your capacity to have those thoughts probably won't diminish until your thinking capacity itself diminishes. They'll always be able to revisit you.

What if you could accept the presence of suicidal thoughts and the discomfort (including deep distress, etc) that accompanies them?

What if you could choose your own values and act on them, regardless of whether you feel suicidal, whether your parents play favorites, etc?

I humbly suggest reading and practicing the skills in A Liberated Mind: How to Pivot Toward What Matters. Given your experience with meditation, you may find it interesting and helpful.

LowPhotojournalist53 · 2020-09-01T01:54:14+00:00

I’ve been suicidal for going on..15 years now. I don’t have an answer for me it never goes away.

deadBeefCafe2014 · 2020-09-01T02:55:07+00:00

First of all, suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem.

It sounds as if your sister was raised as daddy’s little princess. This was a disservice to both of you, truth be told.

I don’t know enough about your situation, but you need to be working on an exit strategy. That might be school, career, military, etc. You need to stake your own claim to this life because none of your nuclear family plans to help you. It’s a brutal rejection, and one you don’t likely deserve.

One thing I will say, when you make it out on your own and you’ve got a solid footing, keep your comms to a minimum. These are the kind of folks who won’t give you a hand up, but will go looking for a handout.

In any case, hang in there! There’s a lot of life ahead of you.

TheWidestOfEyes · 2020-09-01T01:10:53+00:00

I'm new to this myself but I've been in that headspace before so I can do my best.

The key thing to remember is that this is how society has been for a very long time. Though the expression has varied from culture to culture, men have been expendable beasts of burden for the rest of society. Women and children have been given protection and an elevated status at the foot of men's labor.

I knew this, but allowed myself to continue under the peer pressure induced delusion that I needed to go out and get married to be happy. I lied to others and myself about all things political, trying to fit in with friends I knew would abandon me for not being leftist. I still am trying to break these bad habits. I've struggled with suicide over these feelings of worthlessness, over the way men are seen as increasingly worthless, how that misandrist hatred has been extended to little boys and even babies, with feminists openly admitting to preferring one kid over the other, forcing little boys into being trans before they even hit puberty (so they can have the little girl they really want with some bonus work points), and aborting sons before they're born. It has seemed so hopeless.

I say all of this to let you know early what I know now to be absolutely true: the only value a man can have is to himself. After finding MGTOW, I've realized that we can't change the horrors of this new society, the cruel indifference shown to the plight of men, the knives being twisted in the wounds of masculinity. It's too widespread now. This may seem even more depressing, but realizing that we can use our strength in this new way is powerful. We don't need to participate in, fight, or even acknowledge this broken system. We can move forth, immune to their attacks, fulfilling ourselves. Dependent on no one for happiness.

Try to understand that this is how it has always been. This is your chance to cut yourself free, to release yourself from their hooks. Dont allow them to affect you, dont give them the time of day. The care you have for yourself is all you have in this world. Foster it. Nurture it. And go your own way.

MigPOW · 2020-09-01T02:39:30+00:00

Put them in an old folks home when they turn 70.

flibbidy_floob · 2020-09-01T02:58:01+00:00

Hey guy, just want you to know we get it and you're among friends. One other thing, try to remember that sadness/frustration/depression/etc. are temporary states of feeling, they are not permanent conditions you'll be stuck with forever. Things change. Your situation can and will change. You have more power over your destiny than you may realize right now, but someday, hopefully soon, you'll feel it and I suspect you may notice more rays of light coming into your life.

crimsonprodigy · 2020-09-01T04:29:09+00:00

How old are you? If you've finished a secondary eduction or gotten into a trade just save some money and spend the rest on hobbies - you're living rent free with free food, water,electricity internet.

I'd assume you're still in high-school or something? This will pass... You didn't mention any hobbies or what you want to do *shrug* - if it helps to get off your chest fair enough m8.

ToANewMe · 2020-09-01T04:41:47+00:00

You can't choose your parents but you can choose who you want to be. We're here for you brother.

ohgawdwhyme456 · 2020-09-01T06:00:04+00:00

I'm angry that this was removed. This guy needed help. What the hell?! That's why this group was created

QuestionThemAlways · 2020-09-01T05:45:17+00:00

a looong time ago I felt really down as well, life seemed to be pointless, I was always the lesser of the family members, etc.

I sat there one day and thought "You know what, I've never been to another country.... If life is bullshit, then i'm going to just go."

and so I pressed on. with my one goal of going to another country.

I worked my ass off. slaving away at a shit job and putting a bit aside every paycheck.

I got my passport. and kept putting a bit away.

finally, I saved enough to get out and go. but by that time, other things had fallen into place in a good way. I made my plans, bought my ticket, and went. It was the most freeing feeling in the world flying over the ocean after being stuck in one place so long.

it was an amazing experience, and I would not have had it if I had ended it all.

Don't give up.

think of something you really want, maybe it's travel, maybe a new car, or maybe a motorcycle and motorcycle license. think of what it would take to get there.

If you're a minor, then yes, you're kinda limited, but you can still take steps and maneuver yourself to be in the position to put your plans into effect and reach your goal. you can still take the steps that you need to get your goal accomplished.

life is shit sometimes. we all know that. But step back from it all. find something positive to work towards. make it your singular desire and goal. for me it was travel and getting the hell out of where i was. and every little accomplishment towards that goal was a buildup of little victories.

don't give up.

scocasso · 2020-09-01T05:54:19+00:00

Well, maybe you are not your father's son, but the result of some fucking around your mother did. Could be a reason.

Also, fuck your parents. My parents were terrible, and when I was under their roof, life was bleak, and I felt like I was constantly trying to climb out of a dark hole and continuing to slide back down just when I felt I was making progress. Once I finally got out of their home and on my own... wow... life felt so different... it really was them all along that was making me miserable, I thought it was like the entire universe was against me, always fucking me over juuuuuust as I felt I was making some progress, but it was them. Just get away from them. Hey, you can always visit, you don't have to totally ghost them, but getting away from them might help a whole lot. and don't make the mistake of replacing your family with some young woman... just be on your own or be roommates with one of your friends or something... skip the chics

RobinXL · 2020-09-01T05:54:48+00:00

There's really nothing wrong with feeling suicidal. It's a part of life that many other people have gone though and have come out of a thousand times stronger afterwards.

The time that my life turned from mostly negative to mostly positive was when I left my family and hometown and started over at uni.

It showed me that I was not the person that everyone wanted me to believe that I am. Oftentimes you are gaslighted, people project their insecurities onto you.

Especially if you are a good hearted person or a sensitive person, other people don't know what damage they are inflicting onto you. Because they don't feel that much and have less ability to imagine other people's perspectives. Especially if you are very different from most people, people will completely misjudge your character and potential.

All great people in history start with struggle and are made through intense and deep suffering. Thats the only thing that builds character. It gives you the chance to grow incredibly strong. All great people also usually don't fit in to their environment, they're different.

You're at the start of a grand journey! :)

Title	Feeling suicidal
Author	Thick-Marzipan
Upvotes	17
Comments	33
Date	September 1, 2020 12:33 AM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MGTOW
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MGTOW/comments/ika7tb/feeling_suicidal/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MGTOW/feeling-suicidal.173071 https://theredarchive.com/post/173071

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