MGTOW, please, please help me.

WWladCZ · 2017-12-17T07:52:17+00:00

I think your issue is that you don't know who you are. Your validation and entity is tied up in women. I think you need to step back and just search for who you are and who you want to be. Find some new hobbies. Try everything you can. Maybe join a makerspace and learn some cool fun skills from the people there. Learn to work with your hands and think for yourself. Making things, especially when you don't know how to is such a great way to discover your limitations and then break through them.

2017-12-17T08:33:06+00:00

[deleted]

mrcandyman · 2017-12-17T08:47:17+00:00

You guys have managed to be content with being alone, being perfectly happy going your own way...how the FUCK do I get there?!

I had one "serious" relationship when I was 18. I'm 31 now, and I've been alone the entire time.

It was rough going through my twenties. I don't think I was ever "okay" with being alone until I was 27 and found the Red Pill for the first time.

Study Sexual Marketplace Value, Hypergamy, Gynocentrism, Male Dominance Instinct, Female Social Matrix, Male-Mother Need. Watch videos from Sandman, TFM, Barbarossa, Stardusk, Paul Proteus, and RazorBladeKandy.

Looking back, I wasn't "okay" with being Incel / Forever Alone / Blue Pill for almost a decade. But, I can say that something "broke" inside me when I was 25 or 26 and I knew I'd never be in another relationship. Now, when I say "broke", I mean I'd become comfortable with being alone and though I'd still desire a family, I knew it wasn't in the cards.

What makes it hard to be alone is not understanding Male-Mother Need and the Dominance Instinct, which are the two internal subconscious drives that made being alone painful.

As far as the Male Dominance Instinct goes, you need to excel at something to safeguard your mental health. It doesn't matter what it is, but pick something to be great at (or at least in the top 20% among men). As long as you have something that sets you apart from other men, that allows you to be "better" than other men it really helps keep you from going crazy. MDI is also what makes you feel like shit when you're out of work for an extended period of time. MDI is tied in with pride in yourself, your abilities, and what you've achieved. Get a job, be great at something, and as far as MDI goes you're golden.

The loneliness and endless desire to improve both come from the Male-Mother Need drive. MMN is a (seemingly) insatiable desire for approval / validation from others. While the dominance instinct will drive you crazy and ruin your health, MMN will drive you to consider suicide because it's a series of constant internal shit tests: "Why do I bother getting up in the morning?", "What's the point of it all?", etc.

The fundamental flaw in MMN is the belief that you'll find a woman who will love you the same way that you love her. This is incorrect. Women are incapable of loving you the way you can love them. They don't have it in them. A man's love is like the Ocean, vast, deep, filled with beauty and monsters, raging tempests, and gentle waves crashing along sunny shores.

A woman's love is like a well in a desert. Sure, she'll appreciate you, but only as long as you continue to produce for her. If the well runs dry, she'll move on without a second thought. In fact, after she moves on, she'll rewrite her memories to only remember all of the hassle and bullshit of the relationship. You could be the most loving, kind, compassionate man to ever live, but as soon as the relationship is over you become "An abusive, controlling, violent asshole."

For most of human history, men overcame MMN through forming a close bond with another man for mutual support and encouragement. Our society has deemed these hetero-life bonds (bromances) as gaaaaaaaaaaay. You aren't allowed to share a deep friendship with another man because that means you like to take it up the ass, faggot queer homo sissy. Anyway, it's still an option but it's not socially acceptable. Another option is to get a dog.

You can permanently satisfy MMN by going the route of an Ascetic monk. But that requires cutting yourself off from social contact and going into isolation until the desire for external validation goes away. This can take years, but it may be worth it for you.

As for me, after swallowing the red pill and learning about all of the above, I conquered my dominance instinct by getting good at something. I struggle with MMN, though. I prefer to keep MMN around because people who conquer MMN find they lose all motivation to pursue goals in life and I still have shit I want to do.

It's a struggle, bro. But, it also get's easier over time.

gods_bones · 2017-12-17T08:00:43+00:00

Hmmm it seems to me that you have too much time on your hands. Do you work? If not, a job would eat up almost 12 hours of your day easy. Wake up, shower, travel (to and from) and then you get to spend 8 hours talking to coworkers. I would recommend not getting too attached to relationships with females because they are destined to fail, even if you wind up getting married it might still fail one day. So move on from that concept. I think making casual friends with workmates, or joining a sport or activity would be great for distracting you.

Another thing I would recommend is https://meetup.com. Specify your location and then just start looking up according to hobby/interest. Most group meetups & activities are totally free, and it's a great way to meet new people and make friends with them while you are in an environment where talking badly about someone is a big no-no, so the girls are basically not allowed to be mean as it would be seen as her being an antisocial psychopath.

throawaylolaaa · 2017-12-17T08:12:09+00:00

Start lifting, get some confidence lol, make your body look good and its healthy for you as well. Kill all contact with your exes, honestly don't get why people stay in contact with their ex unless its for sex and only sex.

Walmart sells 40 LB dumbbells for 15 dollars (CHEAP AF, I HAVE THIS AND ITS GREAT) https://www.walmart.com/ip/Gold-s-Gym-Vinyl-Dumbbell-Set-40-lbs/21672513

Then get a pull up bar (20 bucks), and a pull-up belt (30 bucks) if you want and thats really all you need for a home workout IMO, and this will last for you a year or two till or till you need heavier weights which should be a pretty cheap replacement.

Focus on school, good grades, get a part time job, internship, graduate and try to get a 40k or higher per year full time job in your late 20s, early 30s.

Retire at 40-50, get pets if you're lonely and enjoy the world. I don't know what else to tell you. Stop seeking women's validation, or any validations in general tbh. Seeking validation is cancer, never change yourself just to please some spastic fucks.

Everyone dies alone, one partner always dies first before the other, and the other is left to die alone and thats usually the male if both reaches old age. (Of course not always, but I'd say 95% of them do)

Good luck OP, I was once like you, but not suicidal though lol.

I'm waiting for sex bots to come out, should be in maximum of 10 years really. So you can look forward to that. I plan on being a blue beta bitch to my bots haha

Zentow · 2017-12-17T10:07:42+00:00

Stop consuming soy, start doing push ups and crunches (10 sets of 10 reps 2-3 times a week), do some sprinting, get enough protein (1g per lbs of bodyweight), get enough calories and get your daily dose of red pills. Do this consistently for 6 months you will see results.

MincoLesharo · 2017-12-17T13:00:50+00:00

You have received excellent information on here and I would take all of it to heart and try to implement every single thing that has been said. I read through your entire post and all of the comments.

Here is my recommendation. Swear off women for a minimum of 12 months.

This will give you time to mature it will give you time to learn about women to learn about yourself and will provide sort of a timeout or a in football terms... halftime.

In this year I recommend reading at least one book per month that is recommended for mgtow and red pill men....see sidebar.

I'm quite sure you can make a request for people to send you books in fact I don't know why we as men have not started sharing our own purchased books with each other.

Since you are resourceful you can also go to the library and check out the books that might be in a public library near you.

Would take 12 months off do not go on any dates do not accept any flirting from women be polite smile and walk away from them or whatever is appropriate. You can even tell them no thank you I'm taking one year away from women... you can witness their behavior change when you do this, they will be more into you and will respect you.

In this time you can gain 15 or 20 lb of muscle doing exactly what you have been coached to do regarding your testosterone.

Get plenty of vitamin D magnesium zinc vitamin b6 and b12.

If you do not eat meat I recommend eating meat and a ketogenic diet.

Look up ketogenic diet and subscribe to the keto subreddit here you can learn a lot.

You can learn a martial art like jujitsu boxing kickboxing or a Japanese hard style karate like Shorinryu.

My nephew just graduated from Marine Corps boot camp and he was not the toughest of all people by any stretch of the imagination. He made it through just fine. The minimum amount of pull-ups you have to do to graduate is only 4. He did 6.

After 2 months of boot camp I think that is incredibly low... you can spend the next two years preparing for the Marine Corps by running every other day and doing physical training like push-ups lifting Pull-Ups and training your mind.

Give yourself those goals and in two and a half years you'll be a goddamn American Marine and you'll laugh of your former self.

Live in peace, brother

M26PershingTank · 2017-12-17T09:34:10+00:00

Ahhh... The cuck feeling. I've had that 3 years ago at 20 years old. Seeking validation from women is not something any man should be doing. Completely got rid of that beta-ness this year. I've been reborn.

I talk to wymyn and get along fairly well with them actually. Let me tell you, they're evil and bring nothing to the table especially in relationships. Its a shame really, alot of guys enjoy ruining their lives with them.

What do you do on a daily basis? You need to find a hobby. I suggest going to the gym or play heavy amounts of video games(both are good options). Join social clubs and get a job. Get a dog. Trust me a canine is something every MGTOW should have. You can dump hundreds of hours trying to teach them shit and the payoff is magnificent. They're loyal. You'll feel like a badass with a dog at your side.

We're gonna have to wash that shitty cuck filth off of you once and for all. Swallow the red pill and change your life

tinytim486 · 2017-12-17T09:39:23+00:00

Like others have said, you need to find yourself first before you try to find your other counterpart. If the things you do are for a partner you want, and not for yourself, you'll never be happy. I think once you cut away parts of your past that are dragging you down, like your exes and bad habits, and instead surround yourself with good friends and healthy habits to build, you'll see an amazing change in yourself.

I know what it's like growing up with a controlling mom and no father figure. Life is just a little tougher when I have to figure everything out by myself: from how to shave to how to handle relationships. It's not easy, but those that find success without one of their parental figures come out a little wiser than those that need both :)

thr0waway1234567j8 · 2017-12-17T10:05:48+00:00

Sounds like dependency issues. You'll have to un-program yourself from that false "I can't be happy alone" mentality.

Find hobbies, read books, throw yourself into something you can get passionate about. If you can't be happy with yourself, then you sure as hell aren't going to be happy with someone else. You'd just be using that person as a crutch against your own insecurities. There's plenty more to life than getting your dick wet and fathering a bunch of little parasites. Whoever gave you the idea that your life doesn't mean anything unless you find a S.O. is a damned liar, and they are the ones who should kill themselves, not you. (yes, even if that person was your mother)

JuicyPezz · 2017-12-17T13:49:04+00:00

First and foremost it's tough at your age. Secondly patients is a virtue. Cultivate yourself and remember baby steps in the right direction gets can get you to where you would like to be. Rome wasn't built in a day. Neither is a Mgtow male

zinaca · 2017-12-17T15:00:19+00:00

In modern society it’s sadly completely normal for a teenage male to have completely messed up emotions, eventually you grow past it.

My emotions were completely fucked until 21-22. Then I finished college and moved quickly from apathy to making my own way. I’m 28 now and I’ve been MGTOW for almost 6 years but I only really found out about MGTOW 6 months ago.

Once you start working, do your best to hold yourself to a routine including on the weekends. Get up at the same time every day, go to bed at the same time every day, get at least 7 hours of sleep every now night. Do the same things in the same order every morning. Sleep in no more than an hour or two extra on the weekends.

Keep your kitchen equipment simple, I do 90%+ of my cooking in a Lodge 10” iron skillet. It might seem expensive to pay $40-60 for a cast iron pan but you’ll have it when you’re 50 if you take care of it. Look up Kent Rollins on YouTube, he’ll tell you all you need to know about cast iron & his videos are a hoot to watch anyway.

Aside from the cast iron you’ll want a small pot to heat up soup, a nonstick skillet to use for eggs or pancakes, and an electric kettle so you can boil water to make tea or coffee at home.

As far as food goes, always keep around some oatmeal and a few cans of chicken noodle soup so you aren’t completely boned for food when you get a flu and can’t even haul yourself to the corner store.

As for household medicines, you should have a first aid kit, some Advil or Tylenol and some Gravol.

For entertainment you’ll want an internet connection and a laptop or tablet that runs Windows so you can run a bittorrent program. Avoid “Windows S” or Android or iOS for now. Then you can get your entertainment solely from YouTube and downloading torrents and not pay a cent more beyond your ISP bill.

Atolla2 · 2017-12-17T19:51:16+00:00

Hey man, I can feel your suffering in your post.

Listen to me man, you need a clean slate. Right now, your mind is this big, stewing mess of mixed emotions & misdirected values.

Take 12 months off women. Heck, it can be 6 months even. Just don't pursue women at all for that time.

Spend as much time as possible doing quiet activities with music in your ears. It doesn't matter what, but personally I enjoyed learning IT skills & hitting the gym. Outside of that, I don't scroll through my phone on the bus, I just sit, listen & think.

You're so frantic right now, a bit of quiet will do you the world of good. This method has helped me regain a grasp on the direction of my life, now I just view the world as a series of endless opportunities.

On the making friends front, I'm not so great at that... I'm sure others will offer advice on that front?

789irvin · 2017-12-17T11:01:58+00:00

You should look at the youtube channel Actualized.org. Absorb the videos that tackle your topic head-on. Think about it and perhaps look at the recommended videos on the same topic too.

789irvin · 2017-12-17T11:15:24+00:00

Start changing your mindset to not giving time to people that treat you badly. People that treat other people badly have something in their life that they aren't happy about. Change your whole mindset positively, people don't respect you because you haven't figured out how to respect yourself. Trust me I had depression for 10 years. I also recommend you watch youtube channel Locario Fan, I've learned a TON from that guy.

Title	MGTOW, please, please help me.
Author	ThrownDaFuccAwAYY
Upvotes	12
Comments	43
Date	December 17, 2017 7:27 AM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MGTOW
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MGTOW/comments/7kclht/mgtow_please_please_help_me/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MGTOW/mgtow-please-please-help-me.523245 https://theredarchive.com/post/523245

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