Hello all,

First time poster. Long time lurker. Although, I have been thinking about posting for a while and just didn't know what to say or how to say what I was feeling.

I am married, have three kids, and work as an attorney. I only tell you this to present a sense of scale to what I'm about to say.

I have been unhappy for a pretty long period of time and I really feel like I am here just for the sake of maintaining a home and not ruining the lives of those closest to me.

As I stated before, I work. But when I come home, the house is usually in shambles. I usually have to do dishes, laundry, vacuum, clean, and tidy up. Mind you, we have a maid that comes every other week. But somehow its not enough.

I get grief for not helping out overnight with my youngest (she's an infant). I also have difficulty raising any of these issues because somehow someway it gets turned back on me that somehow I don't see the effort exerted by my wife.

My kids (and I do love them) either tune me out or openly defy me. I feel that my health is being affected (I have a lingering pain in my abdominal) and there's really no one who I feel comfortable sharing this with except strangers, I guess.

I'm sorry if this sort of post is not allowed. But I wanted to see if the community has had similar experiences or could offer practical advice for a situation like this. I have tried to just relinquish all of my home duties, but my OCD doesn't allow me. I feel compelled as if I'm under hypnosis.

I shared this here, but a lot of the discussion on this board makes sense. The membership is keen on the cost-benefit analysis of relationships, romantic or otherwise and I like that in the clinical sense.

Thanks all.