So I'm living in Japan. I'm giving the dating thing a go. I've heard about herbivore men and I've wondered about it.

First, Japanese women are actually quite beautiful. It's not the little girl dainty prize thing. They have incredible skin, and actually quite amazing hips and figures. Sure, if you love huge breasts there's no making up for that, but it's not like they're all A-cups. Japanese women seem to all be rather smart. Even cafe workers who barely speak English seem rather clever and able to discuss complex subjects I could never broach with most American girls. They are also super polite.

That being said, so we have a baseline, here's the problem... So for one being smart doesn't matter a lot because these women are woefully uncreative. The hive mind reaches new levels here, in terms of affecting the interests and concerns of the ladies. This makes them somewhat difficult and also quite boring. There are some Japanese cultural problems too. People work 6-7 days a week sometimes 12 hours often. Dating professional couples will see each other once every 3 weeks more often than not.

But the real problem is expectations. That was just more context. Japanese women won't make a lot of time for you. If they've "planned" free time with friends, it would be easier to move a mountain than to convince them to flex and invest a little time in their man. Relationship progress is not a priority. That said, ok so what? Because when you're in a relationship there's a constant expectation that the man will protect provide, go out of his way, and so foeth. Do they break up with you if you don't? No, but they nag to high heaven and even with perfect English speakers they are impossible to reason with over this sort of issue. Difficult, if you will. To make matters worse, their libidos are whacked. First and foremost, you have to be totally skinny with a fair amount of muscle mass for them to desire sex with you. They'll put out infrequent maintenance sex otherwise, but it's like a duty and they'll make sure you know that. Even chubby girls demand the muscles and have just zero desire otherwise.

But like I said, they'll still date you, and be furious if you want to break up, even if they have no interest in sex.

As for the sex, it's highly masturbatory. They want you to masturbate them and are really upset if they don't cum multiple times. It's cold and boring. They don't kiss very much or very well, and the idea that sex is a bonding experience is completely lost.

I can tell why Japanese men are saying no. It's not because they're wussies. Japanese women are demanding and difficult, and do very little to fulfill the very simple and basic needs that men have. Despite being "loyal" or "domestic".

My analysis comes from the anecdotes of about 5 American and 3 Japanese men of various ages and body types, including my own experiences, considering the behavior of at least a couple dozen women.

Now, as always, there are individual exceptions "I guess". Mostly, I don't want to unfairly malign Japanese culture. AWALT otherwise.

The point of bringing this up is that I see Japanese women as a sort of exaggeration of that like awful beta American woman. She's in it for herself, and her sexual appetites are this perverse mating strategy designed for survival - not anyone's happiness.

That said, I know of a couple happy Japanese marriages. Both involve a woman who loves her husband's ability to provide and his sense of humor. They are great friends. He is good to her and dutifully goes to work. They haven't had sex since making their 6 year old. Hmm. I'm sure he's never used a prostitute or had an affair.....

American women seem like angels in comparison.