Honest question about anger

Impossible-asset · 2019-11-25T03:58:45+00:00

Be rational.

You do not control anything or anyone. Like ever really. People can and will insult you, do shit to piss you off either willingly or on accident.

The ONE thing you can choose is how you respond and let it affect your mood.

Are those people ACTUALLY impacting your life in some way? Are they costing you a job or an opportunity? No? Then why let it bother you?

Choose the reaction that will bring you peace. And in the face of people who are willfully trying to mess with you, it will be the most infuriating thing to them. Because people who are at peace with themselves have bo need to fuck with others.

DangZagnut · 2019-11-25T03:06:45+00:00

Don't do it.

You're choosing to be angry about shit for some reason. If you feel it coming on, just stop yourself and walk away.

No one makes you angry, you're choosing that as a response because it's comfortable or allows you to fantasize about revenge, or whatever.

It won't do much for you. Sure, you can use it as "motivation" but you better have some specific goal and protocol for that.

Or just don't be angry.

leviathanch · 2019-11-25T11:35:04+00:00

Honestly. I've got an aggression problem myself. Didn't help that everyone back in Switzerland, since I can remember wanted to beat me up. So I had to learn defend myself. Then when I had to earn money, clients and employers fucked me over, so in order to support myself I've put my skills to use and earned some side income with cage fights.

I don't know whether that helps, but being in shape and making people believe that you can do serious harm to them if they don't let you the fuck alone should already be a pretty sufficient deterrent.

I know I'm not much of a help here, but at least you now know you're not alone mate.

1st10Amendments · 2019-11-25T07:47:57+00:00

E. Roosevelt said that a person only has the power to sting you with their insults if you give them that power. Nixon supposedly told a newsman that for the newsman’s questions or comments to annoy him (Nixon), he (Nixon) would first have to respect the newsman, which wasn’t the case.

In Judaism, being angry betrays a lack of belief in God, since nothing happens except God allows it to happen. Therefore, if something happens that would normally anger us, it only happens because God wills it so; it’s part of His Plan.

The correct response to the situation depends on the situation. If a person is attacking you, you may find the need to defend yourself to end the threat, even if that means by physical violence. If someone is insulting you, first consider if the comment has merit, and respond accordingly. My aikido instructor once told me that I (and I quote) “have a proclivity to laxity.” I had never been called lazy in such an interesting way, and I know me, so I accepted the criticism as true, and I laughed out loud.

Some people won’t be happy if someone else is, so they work at making people unhappy and find new ways to do it. You don’t have to let their attempts work. If you don’t get angry, they’re the failure!

But there may come a time when violence is the right answer.

FindingKeeping · 2019-11-25T05:12:45+00:00

Anger doesn't help. It can motivate you but physical violence can never yeild good results

dizrupta · 2019-11-25T05:26:54+00:00

Try being grateful

HairyNipponBasterd · 2019-11-25T06:50:08+00:00

Lol. It's really uncanny to see users here who had experiences similar to mine. I wasn't very good at socializing. I had very few friends but my parents forced me to make more efforts. That was a good move but many trials and errors were made so I became bullied by pupils and teachers (I might be on the spectrum so I had to manually learn these skills).

I had this teacher who really hated my guts when I was 14. For him I was too shy and the dude held double standards for both sexes. Girls made mistake A, "don't worry about it sweety", Boys made mistake A two seconds later, "Can't you useless morons get anything done the right way!". One day I was in a car crash and my dad died. Back to school, there were sheets which required my parents signature so I told him my Mom was at the hospital and that I had no one to sign them. "No probs anon, we'll sort it out"... he could have said "hopefully she gets better" but I guess tit was the best answer I could get from him. Fast forward to due date, he collects the dumbass sheets and comes to me, "well anon, the signed sheets, where are they?", "but I told you about my par...", he retorts "USELESS, ABSOLUTELY USELESS. GOOD WAY OF FINISHING SPLENDIDLY YOUR YEAR ANON". That teacher kicked me when I was at my lowest point in my life. My brother asked me his name so he could whoop his ass but I refused, he wasn't worth the trouble. One of my best pals in that town told me that he was getting what he deserves. Seeing women as angels at all times didn't work out for him when his daughters whored around the public square. I did hold a grudge against him for several years but life is generally harsh towards each individual. I assume that he forgot about me since I'm the least of his problems .

Hodgekin · 2019-11-27T13:59:10+00:00

Your anger is born from resentment to those that bullied you as a child. This includes your own parents, other adults and other children.

You can have a lot of resentment to your parents for not raising you correctly. You can have resentment to the adults in your life that failed to love you. And even to other children that picked on your scabs that were left from a poor upbringing.

My advice is to be honest about what you resent in life. Then to formulate a plan to defend yourself against that resentment in a morally and intelligent manner.

You may find it helpful to also forgive yourself for being bullied as a child. Many children blame themselves unjustly for the sins of their father. As a child, you bear the least amount of responsibility to what occurred to you.

Title	Honest question about anger
Author	Jake4523
Upvotes	1
Comments	16
Date	November 25, 2019 3:04 AM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MGTOW2
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MGTOW2/comments/e19py8/honest_question_about_anger/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MGTOW2/honest-question-about-anger.811555 https://theredarchive.com/post/811555

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