MGTOW as a "cope"

DangZagnut · 2019-11-25T21:05:10+00:00

The idea of MGTOW being "cope" is a psychological defense mechanism.

To a self-identifying incel, everything is horrible and they can never get laid because they're low quality men, only due to circumstances of their birth and their looks, which strangely is something they won't try to work on when some things are solvable, obesity for example.

So people are projecting themselves. The assumption is that a MGTOW is just an incel who is making an excuse, like "I'm not really ugly and undesirable, so I'm going to take my ball and go home!"

Of course this conveniently leaves out all the divorced guys, pump n' dump guys, or those that just don't think it's right for them.

The idea of someone wants to better themselves by not doing what you think is important simply won't compute.

To people claiming the "cope" argument, they're incapable of thinking someone would not care about something they care massively about.

It's the same argument as if I say I don't want a cat. "Oh you hate animals, you really love cats you're just saying you don't like them because you can't get a cat at a pet store, and no cat will stay with you because you're incapable of loving it like it needs", etc.

No I just don't need a cat.

People hate rejection of themselves, and they don't like it when things they like are rejected. Like I'm not really into Marvel movies and I hate transformers. I'm not into a bunch of flashy CGI scrambling around on screen. Just not my bag. But Marvel people will get all upset.

Especially Marvel people who really identify with being Marvel people, but I'm not into it.

If I can get free tickets to a Marvel movie, and I don't go, it can't be that I wasn't interested, it's that I wasn't able to go in the first place (somehow) or the seats would be terrible for some reason. The movie is rejecting me of course.

You see this same logic with the lame Charlie's Angels movie or Ghostbusters. The audience must be to blame because they don't get it, or they're misogynists. It can never be that someone just doesn't care about the movie.

It's just projection...because it's a rejection...of their obsession.

Hmm...I feel like I'm at a coffee house in the 90s doing spoken word poetry with a bongo drum.

MGTOW_BEASTMODE · 2019-11-25T21:16:54+00:00

http://48laws-of-power.blogspot.com/2011/05/law-38-think-as-you-like-but-behave.html

I'm only "MGTOW" to people online. IRL I stay invisible.

soelc3 · 2019-11-25T22:13:17+00:00

If you took the set of all men who self-identify as MGTOW, then undoubtedly some of them would qualify as "incel" if they were part of the dating market. The question then becomes: So what? Why are certain people so bothered by "undesirable" men going MGTOW? It's a much better place to be, psychologically speaking, than hanging out in incel forums obsessing about jawlines, inches of height, and so on. For all the mistreatment that incels suffer, they sure treat each other like shit, and I wouldn't wish it upon any man to have to be part of their subculture. If a supposedly unattractive man needs MGTOW to recover his self-esteem and attain some value in his life, then more power to him.

I recall a poster a while ago who said that if a man is really incel, the best thing he can do is come to terms with it and WALK AWAY, rather than beating his head against a wall. He may still have a desire for sex/relationships, but he's not acting on that desire and doesn't suffer the consequences of repeated failure. You can call that an escape or "cope", but I would call it a sober allocation of resources, away from a problem that can't be solved and onto other things.

Does MGTOW give men an "out"? Of course it does. But why is that a bad thing? Other people's lives are their own. Sometimes it's easier and simply better to remove the circumstances in your life that cause you suffering than it is to restructure your entire personality, worldview and life to attain some elusive measure of external validation from the opposite sex.

cursedhuntsman · 2019-11-25T21:47:54+00:00

Many people claim MGTOW as a cope, but it does not include all MGTOW. /u DangZagnut hit the nail on the head

TigPlaze · 2019-11-25T22:33:01+00:00

Just hanging out in MGTOW circles disproves this. Most MGTOW I've met have been ones who have been able to attract women. It's by attracting women and thus having wives and girlfriends that we've learned by experience that marriage and relationships are a scam and aren't worth participating in.

olsing · 2019-11-26T14:14:54+00:00

Mgtow is community that points out that in most cases there are fewer gains in relationships for men than for women, therefore relationships in most cases are net loose on men side and mainly its caused becouse men think too much with penises first and reason comes when its too late and some women are going to exploit it. Mgtow also is about self development and living a happy life.

There are chads mgtow, there are alpha mgtows, there are beta mgtows and there are incel mgtows. Its normal representation of whole society which means there are fewer alpha mgtows than beta mgtows (as in real society).

Of course there are incel mgtow who use it as cope mechanism - first of all if thanks to mgtow this incels can get their self respect back, meet society requirement by not acting like weirdo, stop beeing obsessed with sex and live a happier life why there are people that are bothered with it? Are they jeleous that others found a way out of pithole that they are in?

But lets be more philosophical - dont all people have cope mechanisms built into their brains? Cope mechanisms are necessary to live a happier live and to not suicide when bad things happens. If someone would get rid off all his cope mechanisms he has to be miserable and unhappy, so maybe its better to live happy and interesting life? "But its lie"? What is the truth anyway?

FlintAustin · 2019-11-25T21:24:33+00:00

Good ol' DangZagnut has spoken with rational only a man is capable of. A certain kind of man, a MGHOW.

To add to his post, one can't simply answer OP's question without relating to the other half of equation.

Females.

They are not objects to be assessed merely by a man's desires and wants. In that I am a feminist. However, once you account for the calculative and cold-hearted approach hypergamy mandates, the man is merely left to play with spoils that other "better" men have had for a fraction of a price that an average Beta-bux is required to pay to have the "fairer" sex's affection.

You can spin it a million ways, but if a man learns and adapts to his solitude and his own company, what a female has to offer becomes a moot point.

DonMelbourne · 2019-11-25T21:53:04+00:00

MGTOW is something used by, mostly, low value males or sexually undesirable ones in order to convince themselves that they're winning by not attracting female attention/not having sex.

There probably are people who declare themselves as 'MGTOW' for that reason. But that isn't how MGTOW is defined, and from the content I've read and seen that doesn't seem to reflect the vast majority of MGTOW posters.

the-lone-squid · 2019-11-25T23:04:52+00:00

Low value men have very little to lose in marriage. So why would they be so against it?

Krazyrobus · 2019-11-26T00:15:33+00:00

As with any large group, there would be diverse sectors. There are probably people who use it as a "cope."

However, so what, if that cope is making you live a more quality life, then so what.

Hodgekin · 2019-11-26T00:51:46+00:00

Mgtow meaning is different between each men, but for me, it was indeed a coping mechanism. But not because I had low smv. My smv is actually slightly higher than avg, and has only increased since I've awaken. My issue wasn't so much women issues, but an issue with self.

My parents were overly protective and at the same time tyrannical, so they beat the confidence out of me at a young age. I had to overcome that myself as I grew older and mgtow was part of that believe it or not.

I'm happily married, so far, and I have a baby on the way. And I plan to keep my marriage healthy by being a stronger and morally right person. Time will tell, but I look towards other people who manage to keep their marriage intact and how they act in this world.

arviman · 2019-11-29T15:58:26+00:00

I don't envy the average blue pilled man, even privately sympathize with them. Sometimes I think it must be nice to in that "ignorance is bliss" outlook they have. I use mgtow to connect with other like minded individuals, if that's cope, sure, just like having any social relation including traditional relationships are a "cope" with the humdrum of life and the certainty of death and the intrinsic lack of meaning to existence.

801735 · 2019-11-26T12:42:21+00:00

(yawn)

Title	MGTOW as a "cope"
Author	Starfighter1988
Upvotes	1
Comments	18
Date	November 25, 2019 8:51 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MGTOW2
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MGTOW2/comments/e1mhmv/mgtow_as_a_cope/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MGTOW2/mgtow-as-a-cope.811544 https://theredarchive.com/post/811544

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