~ archived since 2018 ~

i experienced heart break today

June 22, 2022

i don’t know how to explain it, but i’ve never been prone to mental illness ever. in fact i can’t say there’s ever been a legitimate time i’ve been depressed. however i have a complicated relationship with a girl, a girl whom i love so deeply it’s stupid. she has been suffering a lot of issues lately and has been pushing me away, today she said that she was going to leave me alone and that she didn’t feel right for me. the farther she pushes me the more i ache. it’s so depressing i feel as if i have a physical hole in my chest. everything i do is an attempt at distracting myself from the thought of her, and yet it still overtakes my mind every second of the day. i can’t talk to my family about this, and my friends are harsh when it comes to things like this. i don’t have a good father, and i just feel so alone. is there anyone who can relate or give me a solution for this issue.

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[–]Dolorous-Edd15 3 points4 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

This might be hard to hear, but life doesn’t stop for anything, man. I’ve been in a similar situation as you (I was pushed away after a 4.5 year relationship that took all of my early twenties). Do you mind me asking how old you are? Now’s the time you need to find yourself. Distractions are your best friend right now. Apply for new jobs, rekindle old friendships, learn a new language…it doesn’t matter what you do. As long as it keeps you busy. At the end of the day, you were born as your own individual and you will die as your own individual. It’s up to you to discover who you are, what you enjoy, and how you want to live your life.

I 100% can relate to you here and it sucks, man. It really, really does. She’s pushing you away and you can’t force her to come back. But what you can do is look deep inside yourself and create a life that you want to live. You got this, man.

[–]white-male404[S] 1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

thank you it means a lot. i’m 17, too young for a relationship i know but she was there for so much hardship in my life. losing her is like losing a family member. i do however understand that life is life. no matter how cruel

[–]Dolorous-Edd15 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

The stereotypical 18 year old is getting ready for college/trade school. Are you one of them?

[–]white-male404[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

yeah pretty much, i know it’s so easy to brush off. you know, as petty puppy love. i know i have so much life to live and i’m fixing to experience some of the highlights of my life. these things make rational sense, but it doesn’t help. i just feel empty and filled with sadness. days feel like weeks and it’s getting to a point where i can’t find another way out. i’d like to also add, there’s much, MUCH more going on in my life than a girl. she was just one of the last straws in what seems to be a life of tragedy.

[–]MusicSlave_95 2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

I can feel your grief.. don't worry bro. This is how many of us are right now.

Solution: make new friends, don't tell them about your past. Try to speak with strangers, if you are an introvert, try Omegle chat and make new friends there to start with.

Make new friends on bff mode in bumble. That's for real time friends.

Come back here and let us know how you felt. We are with you!

[–]white-male404[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

thank you bro

[–]UnHope20 1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Sorry you're going through this. I've had at least one or two heartbreaks myself.

It sucks and it's ok to sad about it. Almost everyone who has ever dated has felt this.

You feel intense dread, anxiety and sorrow at the same time.

I'm in a great relationship now and the people who had me all messed up aren't even on my radar now. I'm so glad that she kicked me to the curb to go and find herself. I hope that she found what she was looking for because I definitely did thanks to her.

My current gf is so amazing. It will get better and you may find someone else if you decide to keep dating.

But that doesn't mean things don't suck right now. No one understood or cared about my situation so I went and found a secret place to bawl my eyes out.

You'll be ok. But it's gonna hurt. That's good. Let it hurt. Pain is a teacher, a servant and a friend. It means you're alive and it's healthy.

We feel you king 🤴🏻

[–]white-male404[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

thank you so much

[–]FeedsOnLife 1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

I feel for you man. Sounds potentially like a trauma bond. Might do some reading up on that, see if you think it resonates with your situation.

[–]white-male404[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

it fear it is, but our relationship was never truly toxic. i do however hold on the way i do because when our relationship was good i was on cloud 9

[–]surrealstrength 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I feel you brother. I also had my heart broken after a loving relationship of almost 5 years. I feel much better today even though I miss her sometimes. Truth be told; Every relationship has an expiry date. Someone either leaves or dies. That helped me because it made me realize that my happiness belongs to something beyond the approval of another person.

[–]ok-dude- 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Nothing that time wont solve.. I understand you bro, having to face an ending of relationship sucks alot, specially when you can't do anything to save it.. take your time..

Yup, thats me answering a 6 days yo post to someone in the internet


[–]xX_Scalyt_Xx 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I completely understand you hun it sucks🥺

[–]Tm_1985 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I’m on the same boat this very moment, to the point I was suicidal. This girl who I love very much ghosted me because of my mental health issues. Mainly depression. I hurt at the thought of her, everything reminds me of her like a damn flash back. I’m struggling to keep myself from giving up and seeing that I’m not alone in sentiment makes it a little bit less painful. I lost her and I’m coming to terms. I want to tell you , don’t give up on yourself. Move on and keep distracted with other stuff. I’m 37 years old and my present from her a week ago was to “dump me”. We had one last night together and sex , she even told me that she still loves me but now she is not answering my calls or letting me pick up my things from her place. But you know what, it shows her true colors. If she is not here when I’m at my worst ever, she does deserve me at my best. So man, move on , learn how to live again. Do something you always wanted to do but thought you couldn’t before, go all in and don’t look back. You matter , you deserve better. I know because you are brave enough to tell the whole world. I’m just a stranger but brother, as a man I think that you are important to the rest of us. Work on yourself and once you heal then give a chance to a woman worth of you. And don’t fall too easy like I did. Take your time to analyze if the next one is worth you. Dictate the tempo, stay strong. Love you man.

You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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