How do I not get screwed?

TheYoungie42 · 2012-11-24T05:30:45+00:00

The only way to win, is not to play.

Sad, but true.

bucketh3ad · 2012-11-24T03:11:06+00:00

Please, do yourself a favor and see a lawyer who specializes in marriage and family law. With the huge variance in laws from state to state and country to country, consulting a lawyer who knows the details of your jurisdiction is the only way to get a meaningful answer on how to protect yourself going forward.

That is, other than the answer you're most likely to get here: "Don't get married."

2012-11-24T04:22:06+00:00

There is really no effective legal method to avoid getting screwed. A prenup might mitigate the financial damage, but it won't save you from false accusations.

When you get married, it is as if you hand your new bride a loaded gun which she will carry with her at all times. She can shoot you with it whenever she wants, because it isn't considered a crime if the wife shoots her husband with her wedding gun. You are defenseless and at her mercy. Now ask yourself this one question: do you trust her so completely that you will give her this power over you?

If the answer isn't yes, then don't get married.

MR_Recursive_Ion · 2012-11-24T04:14:04+00:00

Why do you want to get married what advantages dose it provide over not getting married?

After a long drawn out conversation with my SO she wanted a wedding and her friends to think she is married. We don't live in a common law marriage state and don't want kids. So a "wedding" party I will not pay for and a FB status change is the plan.

mikesteane · 2012-11-24T09:26:50+00:00

Ask yourself the question "have you changed in the last ten years?" Ask your partner the same question. Now consider "Is it possible that you will change in the next ten years?" and then "How do I know I can trust the person you will become?" And there you have the answer to why you should protect yourself.

philosoraptor1000 · 2012-11-24T05:33:47+00:00

Here's the thing. If you're worried about protecting yourself, then there is some underlying mistrust of your SO that you're harboring.

If this is the case, then simply dont get married. For the man, especially, there is no legitimate advantage to being married... unless you want to count tax advantages.

2012-11-24T15:11:46+00:00

Lawyer. Prenup.

Most important of all is to be extremely discriminating in your choice of wife. She [like you,] must understand marriage is not like the romance comedies. It is hard. It is tough. It requires the support of family and community. The people with the longest marriages have had the worst times together [and some of the best.] You should both speak to your family members that are still married. You should both speak to your pastor/priest if you are religious. You should seek the support of your families and friends. It is not just the two of you getting married. It is two families joining. Those are the marriages that are the most likely to succeed. You should definitely both speak to competent attorneys if you decide to wed.

Does a prenuptial agreement actually work?

Yes. Read my comments here. Prenups are almost 100% effective if you take the time to draw them up correctly.

2012-11-24T17:06:11+00:00

There is no way to protect yourself if you have children.

2012-11-25T07:47:55+00:00

Form a co-habitation agreement which specifies you do not wish to be married in the eyes of the law.

Then let your marriage be whatever you define it to be.

rightsbot · 2012-11-24T02:50:20+00:00

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Title	How do I not get screwed?
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	3
Comments	11
Date	November 24, 2012 2:49 AM UTC (13 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/13p3l1/how_do_i_not_get_screwed/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/how-do-i-not-get-screwed.1008486 https://theredarchive.com/post/1008486

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