I NEED HELP

kaptainSteez · 2019-04-26T23:38:25+00:00

The only thing people here will be able to do is provide moral support for your very obviously awful situation and I am beyond sorry to hear everything you’ve said.

Hearing your situation nearly brought me to tears. That being said I can’t help you in any other way than to say that I’m here for you and you can PM me to talk anytime.

If you want answers, or a way to handle this situation I would recommend posting to r/legaladvice to try and get this as figured out as possible and try to find something best for you. Truly heartbreaking man and I’m sorry

mgtowolf · 2019-04-27T01:26:57+00:00

Would be great if men had equal resources women have for this type of shit. Men are on our own for the most part. Best advice I can give is get the fuck out, get your own life in order alone, then go for your daughter.

It sucks, but it is what it is. You will be no good at all to your daughter if your crazy ass woman decides to kill your ass one day, which is not out of the realm of possibilities.

erbangermanberben82 · 2019-04-27T04:08:49+00:00

My deepest sympathies. I can't quite tell if you're married to this woman, but you mention "parenting plan", which makes me think maybe so. You mention missing your daughter a lot, which sounds like you're mostly not living with her and her mother?

It's hard to say, but you might need to let it go, at least for a while. Not sure what that would mean. Maybe find someone who'll let you sleep on their couch while you build up some funds. Maybe declare bankruptcy. Not sure, and I really don't know.

Not sure if it's the kind of help you need, but you can get a modest level of support at AA meetings, or perhaps some kinds of churches. Not great, but it's generally free.

Wish I had some better ideas.

wwstewart · 2019-04-27T15:53:02+00:00

It's time to fight. This is going to be a massive battle, so I hope you brought your iron balls. It's going to hurt, it's going to be hell. But...you can win this.

I see that you are not married, however you have a child. That's going to make things emotionally far more difficult, but you can still win. But it won't be easy.

Since she was arrested, you already have proof that she's abusive. An attorney is recommended, but usually not required.

You're going to want to start the leg work, and don't do things all spread out. When you start dropping legal bombs, you want to go scorched earth. Fire all of the nukes at the same time.

Are you on the birth certificate? If so, you have parental rights as well. You may need to file an emergency custody order (you don't actually need an attorney for that, and you have evidence to get a protective order).

Naturally, that isn't going to stop her from trying to keep your child away, and unfortunately that's reality. You'll need to do more work to make that happen, and it might take a bit of time. It'll suck, but you still have a chance for a good outcome.

With that evidence, you can get her removed from the lease in most places. Anything you're paying for that's exclusively for her...drop it. Your focus now should be the safety and well-being of yourself and your child ONLY.

Start reading up on your local laws. Handle this as you would a divorce.

Once she's removed from the lease, be prepared for her to show up. With the protective order in place, if she shows up...don't play nice. Call the police. Don't open the door. Don't talk to her.

Any interactions you have going forward need to be documented: screenshots, recordings (check your local laws to make sure you can record conversations/phone calls).

This is going to be a war. You need to fight it like one.

Don't move out of the house. Start checking the local laws, ask people who have been through a hostile divorce that you know what they did. Once you have a plan, execute the plan as fast as possible and for the sake of your child DO NOT LET UP.

I'm truly saddened that you're going through this. It's going to be the hardest thing you've ever done most likely...but it's doable. You can (and likely will) win this.

Good luck, sir. Time to start kicking ass.

PungentMayo · 2019-04-27T20:46:43+00:00

Dude this breaks my heart. This is a completely unfair situation. I can only provide moral support. Also you might want to check out r/MGTOW . It'll have some people who would've been in your situation.

AskingToFeminists · 2019-04-27T07:47:07+00:00

I'm really sorry to hear about that. I'm not sure what kind of advice to give you. I'm from France and not really familiar with the law anyway, let alone the system of the US.

As someone said, /r/legaladvice might be the place to go to learn what are the ways you can solve that. All I can do is to upvote your post so that it gain visibility (maybe someone else here is more familiar with father's rights or help for abused men), and offer you my compassion and an ear to listen to you.

I have read and heard stories of men who were in a similar situation and managed to get through it, so know that your case isn't hopeless.

May I ask how old your daughter is ?

I don't know, I will suggest a silly idea, but maybe with enough silly ideas, one will be worth the try.

I heard once that through Kickstarter, a guy raised, with a fluke of luck, a few thousand dollars for his project of making a potato salad. Maybe you can try a "help me get away from my abusive partner" crowdfunding campaign. It could be worth a try.

Meyright2 · 2019-04-27T08:49:02+00:00

Try calling someone from https://ncfm.org/ maybe they now what to do

Title	I NEED HELP
Author	kidsillyfresh
Upvotes	23
Comments	12
Date	April 26, 2019 11:22 PM UTC (7 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/mensrights/comments/bhsvar/i-need-help/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/i-need-help.1626259 https://theredarchive.com/post/1626259

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