• Women are only interested in women and themselves.
  • Men are only interested in women and themselves.
  • Help will be constantly expected, but rarely given.
  • No matter the magnitude of tragedy in your own life, the smallest slight in another's will be more important.
  • Every first look you get is tantamount to "what can he do for me".
  • Parental approval is based on what they can tell their friends.
  • If you're rarely angry or depressed, those emotions will be seen as irrational, no matter the cause.
  • If your disabilities are not visible, they do not exist to others, even if told.
  • Talent is useless unless you are at least proficient in all other areas, even when irrelevant, even when those judging you are not themselves.
  • Threesomes with two women are grossly overrated, forget about multiple men.
  • Never go into business with friends, they probably aren't actually your friends.
  • Your grade has far more to do with class participation than is claimed.
  • Always choose male teachers, and if you're white, they should be as well; sexuality is irrelevant.
  • If anyone asks for anything, and it could in anyway be connected to a stereotype (Asian friend asks for the karaoke playlist), say no in public.
  • If you live on your own, don't be friends with people who still live at home.
  • If you have a car, never tell anyone about it; if they find out, just say they never asked. - Learn to deal with the police, and things will go smoothly; especially important if you're not white/Asian (or have an accent). - Friends don't come first, you come first.
  • There are exceptions to every rule.
  • Don't look for exceptions.

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