It is a well established fact among the gentlemen and gentlewomen of this esteemed debating society that the vast majority of young men are sadly bereft of female companionship. Many posts have been written, bemoaning this fact, arguing it’s causes, observing that women are sluts, and so on.

Having carefully considered the matter for some time, I humbly propose that society should do the obviously correct and necessary thing, and dispose of the least attractive 80 % of its men.

The reader, doubtless in agreement, might well be wondering what painless methods might be devised to spare these unfortunates in death the agony they endured in life, by being denied sex. While well intentioned, may I suggest a more edifying alternative: a spectacle where the deficient men are hunted by chads for sport.

Packs of men, who have been found expendable by a committee of civically-minded women would be released into a large forested play area, with chads in hot pursuit. If correctly calibrated, the game should provide an afternoon of sport for the chads and an agreeable spectacle for the women spectators (the more well bred of which will decry the spectacle in between bouts of furious self-pleasure in the restroom.). To introduce an element of suspense to the proceedings, the game could be constructed in such a way that a few of the condemned men would be able to escape. These would then receive certificates promoting them to chadlite status.

And therefore it seems certain that this proposal will be agreeable to all concerned. The bottom tier of men will find the outcome no worse than their present circumstances, with the possibility of a dramatic improvement; chads will simply recognize their fantasy life made real; and women will of course recognize the final goal of feminism attained.

Utopia awaits. All that is wanted is the courage to bring it about.