Hey, I (almost 28M) am new to the sub, as I recently made the decision to "migrate" over from r/CatholicDating (yep, I'm Catholic, but I tend to find Protestants and non-denominational or unaffiliated Christians to be way more on point / less blue-pilled than my fellow Catholics re: Biblical masculinity, relationship, and sex advice... plus many of the women on there cannot or at least do not argue properly). I've gotten enough pushback in the form of condescension and generally illogical banter on that sub to realize that, despite one of my Lenten commitments to avoid red pill content (as I had become toxic in much of my thinking), spending some time on this sub would be a good move to get my mind straight and find some camaraderie this Lent. To kick things off:

  • Mission: My mission is to finish law school (currently a 1L at a Top-20 US law school), use my degree to work within the bitcoin community, and raise a strong Catholic family to combat our decaying secular society. Admittedly, my fairly high sex drive (I'm a virgin who's off porn but struggles on a weekly if not daily basis w/ masturbation) is a big reason why I'd like to marry before my mid-30s (sometime between 29 and 32 ideally), and I believe I'd really enjoy and benefit from the presence of a beautiful, kind, humble and feminine woman in my life. I also love my nephew and nieces and would like to have children of my own.
  • Stats: Body fat = 13-15%, Height = 6'1", Weight = 184-186 lbs, Lifts = ? (former collegiate rower who shifted not quite a year ago from a moderate/high amount of endurance running and light calisthenics to my current low/moderate amount of endurance running and heavy calisthenics, machines, and free weights... likely slightly below intermediate on the big compound lifts). I almost never drink and have never done any recreational drugs.
  • Reading: I've read a decent number of Rollo's online articles but have mainly learned the red pill from lots of YouTube videos (Richard Cooper, then Rollo, plus some others - including some real junk that was more MGTOW or incel type stuff). I've also watched some of the RPC YouTube content - a primer for my checking out this sub.
  • Finances: I'm a 1L on scholarship at a Top-20 US law school w/ a high paying part-time gig ($100+/hr for 5-10 hrs/week). I was making just over $90k the last 2 years, have a net worth of around $500k, expect to have decent low six-figure options coming out of law school w/ no debt and have a credit score > 800.
  • Spiritual: I think I'm spiritually mature, at least relatively speaking, as I pray at least every morning and night and often go to weekday Mass, plus I have quiet times when I go for park walks like I'm in my 70s. Now comes the part where I can get ripped on for being Catholic haha: some of my biggest shortcomings are (1) my non-existent Christian brotherhood (aside from 1 Christian guy in my law school class who's going JAG) and limited social network more generally speaking and (2) my only recent exploration of Scripture itself (this is arguably the stereotypical Catholic deficiency coming to the fore)... I've mostly been lone-wolfing it, so to speak, aside from some rare connections here or there. Getting sufficiently on point to lead and make disciples is where I think I need the most work.

Okay - the meat of the post: I've only been on dates with young Catholic women between the ages of 21 and 24, and online I've only video chatted with women in that age range (w/ 2 exceptions), and I've noticed that - generally speaking - there tends to be a sizable gap in emotional maturity between me and the woman. I've always been an 'old soul' and got into dating 5+ years after I graduated college, which has had its pros and cons, but I'm concerned I don't have a good grasp of how mature "your typical faithful Catholic (or, more broadly, Christian) woman between the ages of 18 and 24" should be. I'm the middle of 3 sons, have never had close female friends (accustomed to sports teams + I generally oppose the idea), and am extremely analytical - such that I sometimes break down recent dates like cases from law school. I may be very low on the autism spectrum, as in very high functioning, but I'm not that socially awkward and lack the extreme symptoms (e.g., cannot hold eye contact, get irrationally upset when your routine is disrupted, etc.)... I'd say I'm more so socially naive or romantically inexperienced than awkward.

FWIW: I think I'd match up best with a woman 4-10 years younger than I am for several reasons: (1) she'd be more likely to also be sexually inexperienced (this currently matters a lot to me), (2) she'd be more likely to embrace my mission in life rather than compete with me in the relationship, (3) she'd be less likely to hold my limited dating experience against me and (4) I'd be less concerned that she has "baby rabies" / is feeling the pressure of her biological clock and just sees me as "the good guy" at the end of her possibly jacked up love story... I don't look like Beta Bucks but am definitely on the BB side of AF/BB in terms of my character, personality, and attitude toward women (despite significant improvement in terms of frame... still the gentleman type and couldn't even pretend to be the bad boy type for a single date - not that that's bad).

All that said: my 20s have been huge for me in terms of personal development, in myriad ways, so naturally I understand that - despite the (potentially incorrect) conventional wisdom that women emotionally mature faster than men - young women still need time to grow into themselves as well. My question boils down to where I should expect a woman to be (emotionally speaking) when I first meet her v. how much I should expect to grow with her in a relationship. (And I know this isn't an exact science...)

Here are some specific observations regarding which I'd appreciate some advice:

> Currently pursuing a post-college degree (especially if impractical like a PhD in Philosophy) or plans to do so (often implying a multi-year time commitment and misaligned priorities)... I don't consider this a deal-breaker, especially because I'm sympathetic to the feminist brainwashing that even Christian young women experience, but I do think it can be problematic in Christian dating for several reasons.

> VERY feelings-based and eager to progress the relationship without looking into practical considerations (long-term living preference, whether she'd be open to being - and hopefully wants to be - a homemaker, etc.)... I think there are so many closet feminists out there among "conservative" Christian women who don't even know it.

> More responsive to my words than my actions... This one still boggles my mind: calling a girl "pretty" when she's into me >> consistently demonstrating my character and respect for her. I wouldn't use this to manipulate young women, but wow, would it be easy to do... Do you think this is the norm for 18-24 year-old Christian women who actually live the faith?

> w/ "the wrong crowd" or, in other words, has bad influences in her life (party-girl type friends)... Yes, I know this is one of Richard Cooper's red flags, but at the same time some girls just need time to grow up (w/ the requirement they don't hop on the CC due to peer pressure). I don't want to go to the chopping block too quickly on some of this.

> MUCH more easily stressed by school, family problems, and whatever else may crop up than I am or really ever was during my early 20s... This I think is par for the course between men and women generally speaking, but frankly, I'm trying to figure out what is "normal crazy" for young women and what is "crazy crazy" (BPD and the like - with which I have a bit of dating experience).

TLDR; I don't understand what from my dating experience is attributable to inherent differences between men and women (which I therefore need to accept) and what shows 'unacceptable' emotional immaturity in a woman nowadays... I don't expect my future wife to be just like me, as that would be weird and awful for lots of reasons, but I don't want to set my expectations too high: I'm worried I'd miss someone really great who hasn't come into her own yet.