I had the first little bit of resistance since starting the RP.

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For context, I have been making an effort to be more direct about initiating and making my intentions clear before bedtime. Changes seemed to be well received, no opposition anyways. Also I have been slowly working on adding things into the bedroom for the last couple months, (before RP, which lead me to RP) Nothing to crazy, trying out new positions, blindfold, performing oral on her, introduced a vibrating penis ring which was a big step for her, then a bullet vibe. I've tried to introduce a few subtle dominance aspects (pin her arms down, spank, verbalize what I’m doing, really pounding her) lately also, I’m not really sure how well they are received yet to be honest. I think it's pretty strange for her but she hasn’t objected and when she is in the mood I think she likes it, which isn’t all the time.

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The last thing I (re)introduced was her giving me oral. We used to do it for each other early in our marriage. At some point she told me she didn’t really wish to give or receive in general. At the time I didn’t care too much as I preferred intercourse anyways and honestly she wasn’t very good at giving head. I decided I wanted to try again, I sent her a link to a commonly referenced BJ guide on reddit in a text during the day and told her,

“I’m sure you’re a little out of practice, I have some homework for you to do before tonight.”

Well she must have read it pretty thoroughly because wow that was a 100x better than I had ever gotten before, I didn’t even let her go for all that long because I didn’t want to finish before some PIV. She seemed to enjoy giving it also and must have turned her on, she had possibly the most intense orgasm she’s ever had during the following sex.

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She has been complimenting me more and more on my physical appearance.between that and my behavior/leadership changes she seems to be getting more turned on when she is in the mood, but I’m still far from getting her turned on at will.

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Anyways, back to where I failed(?) my test. I initiated last night right when I got out of the shower for the evening, about an hour before we usually go to bed.

That's when she tried to have a talk with me, “RBdadbod, I don’t know if I can keep up with you. So much is changing, you seem like a different person. Am I ever going to be enough for you?”

I was caught off guard and froze trying to think of a response, trying to refrain from comforting and own myself. After a little bit too long of a pause I said,

“I’ve been enjoying these changes and you have been doing great keeping up.”

I didn’t give a response to her last part, maybe I should have told her that I intend for the changes to continue?

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She let that part of the conversation drop after my response, and moved back to the initiation attempt. She countered me by giving her 15 minutes to finish some things and then getting busy. Again, I didn’t know how to react putting it in frame, I didn’t want to negotiate for bad sex but didn’t want to sound butt hurt.

I just said, “No, it's fine, lets just try again another time when it works better.”

She insisted though, I thought that if I didn't oblige I would be sulking so I just acted nonchalant and agreed. The result was sex where it was just me focused. She wanted to do doggy-style, a position where she doesn’t get much out of and is just trying to get me to come. I’m still struggling with this aspect, I know I am not supposed to concern myself if she orgasms, but when it's obvious she isn’t concerned with trying to get any pleasure for herself and only me it isn't nearly as enjoyable.

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How should I have handled my test?

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BTW, when asking for advice like this should I be doing this in OYS or is creating a post the best way to get a response?

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Stats: 170 lbs, 5'11" still haven't checked body fat but I'm starting to get some muscle tone.

Read: All Sidebar, NNMNG, MMSLP, SGM, RM

Finance: 100K+ salary, Mortgage only debt.

Spiritual: Working on it, Have been doing better being families spiritual leader and less passive.