My husband works a regular 40 hour week from home .

I homeschool my kids and run my special needs son to therapy 3x a week. I also run a full time business from home.

I do 95+ % of everything. Housework, cooking etc. We have spoken many times and even made schedules about him being a little more helpful such as taking care of dinner twice and week, doing dishes twice a week and throwing a new load in the washer (and transferring what’s in the washer to dryer , then folding what was in the dryer and I take care of the rest ) 3x a week. It never happened/happens. I’m trying not to project my frustrations and I do NOT want to be naggy. We’ve been together 10 years and I spent 8 of them constantly asking him for help and it became the basis of all conversations and essentially the resent built on both sides . I don’t want to get back there. I’ve recently hired a cleaner to come bi weekly but I’m still having trouble keeping up with everything .

What is acceptable to expect of him? When I’m not asking for help or expecting it , things are peaceful. Sometimes I wonder if I should just make peace with him not doing anything around the house so I don’t feel resentful.