"Connection through conflict"

[deleted] · Thu Feb 18 14:36:55 2016 UTC

[permanently deleted]

VintageVee · 2016-02-18T19:57:00+00:00

It doesn't seem to be allowing me to edit to include this on the post, but here is my take on this:

This article was posted by Laura Doyle, author of Surrendered Single and Surrendered Wife, on her facebook page today. Her heading was: "The more you push your perspective the harder the other person feels the need to push theirs. The only way out is to stop arguing and start listening. Sometimes, it's hard to know when to stop. We push, and push, and push--and before long, we're fighting with our husbands much more often than we're having fun with them. Have you stopped arguing with your man yet?"

Having read the article, I appreciate the practical steps laid out in order to avoid and manage conflict, such as get into the mindset that it's you and your SO against the issue, not you and SO against each other. The article encourage empathy and true listening to your partner so they feel heard. It's a nice short reminder that no one wins during conflict, but that if you are havbing unavoidable conflict, here's how to bring yourselves closer through it - by showing the other person you are there to listen.

Personally I have always found that in my current relationship, the few arguments we have had have been respectfully worked through - largely due to my SO's ability to shut down hamstering and to get to the point. We are always closer afterwards because I feel heard and so does he, and he feels he has solved a problem (he has) so it encourages him to listen next time. Overall I think it's relevant to RPW because it's encouraging us to avoid unnecessary conflict and to listen carefully when it does take place.

Title	"Connection through conflict"
Author	VintageVee
Upvotes	6
Comments	5
Date	February 18, 2016 1:16 PM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/RedPillWomen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/46eoez/connection_through_conflict/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RedPillWomen/connection-through-conflict.166703 https://theredarchive.com/post/166703

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