How do I get time alone with him?

FuneralWithAnR · 2018-08-23T10:55:54+00:00

If you were older then I'd get annoyed by the silliness, but you're still 17, so I'll explain it in the simplest terms.

You've got loads of chances to talk to him. He's quiet. You've got loads of things in common. He's never really talked to you.

He's shy too.

No boy in that age group would not be thinking of every girl he sees, especially those he sees often.

Talk to him, ask him about his weekend or plans for the upcoming weekend. LISTEN to what he said and talk about whatever he said. Allow him to talk about himself or things he's interested in.

Great video on getting people to open up to you and like you:

https://youtu.be/OyV8LELM_HM

When people get the feeling you're interested in them or what they're talking about, they're more likely to like you and remember you, more likely to continue talking to you and even ask you about yourself. That's what you want initially.

From there, you can talk about anything. Because that person has already invested so much time in you by telling you about themselves, they'll be more likely to hear you out. It's like a give and take exchange. I gave you info on myself and invested time in you, now I'm expecting the same out of you.

Everything above can and should be used by everyone.

Right, so now you've established a good "talking" friendship. Yes, you're already friends. Keep that up for like two weeks, and then ask him if he's down to go bowling or something similar. It should be an activity that builds up a connection between you two where you're competing, in a healthy manner, against each other. This builds comfort. Invite his lads too, if he doesn't seem like he wants to come alone, and get your girls too. Make it a group thing. But work towards getting him alone. Invite him to ping-pong at school if that's an option. Guys love to bond over sports.

And don't DON'T don't DON'T don't DON'T!!! Don't overthink every word. Guys can smell insincerity through words, so speak without calculating your words. You should also know that guys don't bond because of words spoken, they bond through shared experiences and activities. That's the reason I said take him to a sport thing, not take him to dinner, coffee, etc. A guy will zone out eventually when it's just talking. He won't zone out if you're both DOING something. That's why you'll see guys barely talking but they'll be the best of bros out there. You wanna build a relation with him where you're both comfortable with each other, even if it's in total silence.

From there, the real dating begins. This is where you take him to the movies, walks by the river or something, etc etc. Now that he's invested so much time and energy in you, he's more likely to do stuff he won't with his other friends.

Good luck.

P.S.: forget the drama bullshit, keep texting to a minimum, call instead (yes I know it's fucking dreadful for kids your age, I also have a 16yo brother). Guys, especially a boy in your age group 16-17, don't give a flying FUCK about previous drama. If you're nice and sincere with him, he'll be your best friend, your boyfriend, whatever the vibe is between you two.

Edit 1: Grammar

Edit 2: He may be overwhelmed initially by your attempted contact. That's fine. He's also a kid. He's probably a virgin. He's probably never had a female friend. Be patient. He's also as insecure as you. The best thing to do about that is to suppress that feeling and act naturally with each other.

Pie_021 · 2018-08-23T03:56:54+00:00

Seems like you get a lot of chances to talk to him. Take advantage of those opportunities. Start with something simple, "Hey how was your weekend?".

RozaHathaway · 2018-08-23T17:24:58+00:00

Share a lane so I'm assuming swimming? If that's the case while on the wall say something along the lines wow what a hard set huh? Or talk about the sport after practice.. compliment his athletic ability and ask for technique advice. For example you can say, nice drop on that last set, you have a great stroke, any tips on how I can improve? Once you break the ice it gets easier to talk..you have alot in common it seems so should be easy to have a conversation on mutual interests.

shine_on · 2018-08-23T12:35:04+00:00

You get a chance to talk to him when walking to class. So ask him if he can help you with some of your studies, say there's some concept you don't quite understand and you'd like to talk to him about it over a coffee. Or you need help with your technique for the sport you play.

Whether you actually need help with your class or sporting technique is absolutely totally 100% irrelevant.

Is there a reason you can't sit near him in class? Ask a couple of your friends to sit there with you so it doesn't look like you're abandoning all of them.

You said in another comment "I’m pretty confident normally, but I have no idea how to open a new conversation with him, or what I’d even talk about." And yet you've mentioned sharing classes, sharing a sport... talk to him about that. Ask him what other classes he's taking, how important this particular class is to him, and so on.

LateralThinker13 · 2018-08-24T17:29:15+00:00

I think I lack the time to really actually talk to him. We haven’t ever discussed interests, hobbies, etc. He seems like a great guy, but I just want to be able to talk to him.

Walks up to him before class. "Hey XXX, wanna hang out sometime?" Hands a note over. "Here's my number. See you in class!" Walk away.

Done. Anything else is high school drama.

It's really that simple.

CalvinRichland · 2018-08-23T04:56:54+00:00

Say Hi and then see what happens.

Title	How do I get time alone with him?
Author	throw6137
Upvotes	19
Comments	13
Date	August 23, 2018 3:49 AM UTC (7 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/RedPillWomen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/99k32f/how_do_i_get_time_alone_with_him/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RedPillWomen/how-do-i-get-time-alone-with-him.67556 https://theredarchive.com/post/67556

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