TL;DR, Was awesome, got married, beta bucks, divorce is the best thing ever, got my frame back.

Its been about four years since I posted a field report, it was in seddit back then. I had plates spinning, 5 to 10 at one time, some would fall, new ones went up, it was the most fun time of my life. One woman in particular piqued my interest, so I took the route that popular public opinion expects of me, focused on her, got married, and gave my balls away... I became the manipulated man, a beta bucks husband. It was fun at first, sex was wild and often, I was on a pedestal which I should have been, I'm the prize. However I climbed my way down and she moved her way up through her manipulation and my lapse in judgement. She became more demanding, and I became more miserable. I withdrew from my friends and my hobbies, and my identity was simply husband and homeowner. She ultimately cheated, and this is the greatest gift she has ever given me, because it woke me the fuck up. I filed for divorce 2 weeks after I discovered her affairs. When she refused to leave my house, I removed myself...I'll get it back later... moved out 3 months ago and haven't spoken to her since. After a motion for sole possession didn't work, we offered her a proposal for the house, it would be hers if she could get financing to purchase it, of course she failed. She's moving out of the house end of this month (told you I'd get it back).

I've spent the past 3 months internalizing, learning about myself, and focusing on improving myself. Reading lots of books on psychology and Co-dependence, attending therapy and group sessions. Don't be afraid to go to a therapist once in a while, its like going to the gym for your brain. I've started playing hockey again which I love. Been hitting the gym and going for runs. My friends have welcomed me back with opened arms. New friends have entered my life. Her friends have chosen me as she's proved to them she's mentally unstable, and I've been a rock through this. I got myself a stylist and have been upgrading my wardrobe, and its getting me noticed. I wake up everyday and tell myself, "Today you have a decision to make, you're going to get better or you are going to get worse, but you are not going to stay the same. Whats it going to be?"

SantaCon was in my town a couple of weekends ago. I love Christmas and I love this event, haven't been to it in years. My friends and I suit up with some fresh new Christmas garb and hit the town. We look good, people are taking photos with us, and sure enough we made the cover of the local paper. I'm just living in the moment, smiling and having a good time with my friends. Starting to notice the IOIs come in from the Mrs. Clauses. I don't even hesitate to move in and start chatting, tossing away shit tests, I'm laughing they are laughing, getting numbers, running into girls at the next bar that saw me earlier. One HB8 is getting handsy, I'm playing with her asking if she likes my hockey butt. Her name was long and I knew I wasn't going to remember it as I was drinking all day so I started calling her "Mo"... she kept saying "Thats not my name" but I never broke frame and called her Mo all night...and she didn't stop grabbing my ass all night. Was making out with her, wanted to get her back to my apartment but she put up the ASD. No problem, I had so much fun that night.

The next day I'm hanging out with my buddies and recapping the events of the day before. We're laughing about Mo and how I wouldn't call her her real name and how she was all over me. I look up at my buddies and said "I'm Back". I texted her on my lunch break last monday, "Hey Mo". She was excited. I set up a date, was flirty, concise and too the point... she couldn't be more thrilled to go out with me. Checked in with her once more during the week, and finally a message on the day of the date saying "Looking forward to tonight, see you at 7".

The date was great, I was looking good in one of my new outfits and new shoes (Which she complemented), she was running late as every girl does, "K". I was chatting with a nice couple at the bar about visiting the Allagash Brewery. She comes in sits down, and I was just feeling in frame. Convo was great, she started asking questions about where I live etc... Said I own a house, but am in an apartment currently nearby, will be moving back to my house soon to do some reno and sell it. Of course the why do I own in X town and now live in Y town question is next. I'm not a liar, thats what women do, I own my shit so I put it on the table, "I bought in X town when I got married, my soon to be ex is moving out at the end of the month." Of course she then wants to pry and learn why I'm getting divorced...but thats none of her business, I kept my boundary, remained stoic and said "Thats not something I'm going to talk about tonight, it was a difficult experience, but I have learned a lot from it, grown from it, and am better for it." She ate that shit up, and never brought it up again.

We moved to another bar where we ran into one of her friends. I'm flirty with the friend HB6, chatting with HB6's guy friends and really just owning the room. HB8 is hanging on me again, i'm enticing her to grab my ass and she can't help herself. We hit up one more bar to go dance, I'm busting out moves, its just fun, she's having a good time, I'm teasing her and say "Are you peacocking" She is just cracking up and can't get enough of me. I tell her I'm going to keep calling her "Mo" and she has to earn her name back one syllable at a time, she is loving this. Finally I say "Lets get out of here" and we headed back to her place... so I got one plate spinning right now, there will be more to come. Since I have no desire to be in any LTR or married, I feel completely free, I feel even better than I did 4 years ago.

The power of just being in frame, living in the moment, and enjoying myself enables everyone around me to enjoy themselves in my presence.

I'm back.