Through the years I've seen people around here struggling to make it into social circles and actually conditioning their friendships, trying so hard and in the end they came back complaining how groups reject them and how it's difficult to join a social circle or keep friends with people.

First thing to remember about friendships & acquintances, no one likes a person who doesn't offer them value but also seeks to join their group and get value. To put it in other words, people have to appreciate you not just for your company, but for some form of value you provide to them too. You cannot just be a burden to anyone's back.

Like you, everyone is a human and has needs, that doesn't mean you have to strip yourself off all of your dignity and go over the edge for someone for no reason. If they offer your their company and fun times contribute to it by being a good listener, offer some advice if they ask you for example, or show them a new place and take the lead going there and give yourselves a wholesome new experience.

Second one, grow a pair and set some standards, draw some lines. You need to have a set of unwritten "criteria" in your mind and what I mean by this is that how much time and dedication does it take you to gain someone's trust and spend more time in depth of a good friendship? It should be like this for when someone seeks to be your friend too. Don't just go around becoming friends with anyone, sure you can hang out but your real friends through the years will be so few. Plus you will be more selective and better at judging who is worth being around, who offers you value and who not. Who to keep and who to drop.

Third. Treat others how they treat you. I recently became friends with someone in my vicinity and they guy just enjoyed how I was drawing everyone into my frame, so he invited me to his place. We sat there and had fun all night, then again he wanted me to drop by so I did and this time around he introduced me to a few hot chicks and I started a fling with one over the next few days. In return, I had a long term friend drop by my city for a while and he brought some good "stuff" from far away so I made a gift I knew my new friend would appreciate. It felt liberating to also give and not just take.

What you see here is an example of someone offering value to someone else by inviting them home and introducing them to groups of chicks and friends, and the other person responding similarly with an action as a token of appreciation. This would signify a healthy friendship. You automatically get value when you offer value too in such a situation.

In other situations people get screwed because they are too beta to break the cycle, their friend manipulates them because they are too caring and giving without setting rules and boundaries and it comes to a point the other person is frustrated but keeps treating the manipulator like a friend, hoping he'll change and bring balance to their relationship. NEWS FLASH: WRONG.

Avoid that at all costs. Don't spare people who drain your energy and time and seek attention without offering you nothing at all. Including women (Oviously don't make friends with women, but this will be another subject for another time fellas).

You should also remember to take care of yourself first and make sure your most important needs like fitness, diet, and priorities like your long end goal are met and then take some time to enjoy your-self. This will also allign perfectly with one of my favorite laws of the 48 [^sidebar]

"Law #16

Use absence to increase respect and honor.

Too much circulation makes the price go down: The more you are seen and heard from, the more common you appear. If you are already established in a group, temporary withdrawal from it will make you more talked about, even more admired. You must learn when to leave. Create value through scarcity." by u/pjewa

That also means don't smash someone's cellphone when you first meet them and get along, don't be needy and clingy, make something good out of the time you are alone and everyone else is unavailable, focus on you. Then initiate contact every now and then and watch who initiates too.

By the way if you're new around here check the sidebar material out, and especially the 48 laws of power. It's one of my favorite sections and has offered me much wisdom when I underwent the process.

Last and most important. Don't sweat it too much. You make friends so as not to travel through this journey alone, but it's important to remember that you have to get comfortable when you are alone first and understand that if you're feeling lonely, it's totally normal and that better days will come, just socialize when you get the chance with people you like and hang around if you have the time, talk a bit and crack jokes, tell them to grab a coffee together if they're free and available and the rest will follow from there. You first have to take care of your self-improvement and look at the bigger picture, focus on your goals and while at it make friends, just don't try too hard and flow with it naturally. And it's only natural not everyone is going to like you, don't give a fuck and continue.

However, if you see a person doesn't want you around or doesn't give interest in your actions towards them, remember not to bust their balls and annoy them with your presence. Not all people are gonna like you, and some will use you. It's natural and I do it too, you have done it too. I have friends for drinking, friends for talking, friends for a coffee and other friends to buy clothes will, also other people to travel with. Some people on my list are just there because they wanted to stay around even if I didn't, so I always remind myself not to be a needy asshole if someone pulls back when I move closer. Talking with some people often also doesn't mean you should be friends or have a connection, like meet up often or anything. It's up to you and up to them.

Good luck guys.