Just Be Yourself

Evolved_Red · 2014-04-09T12:29:48+00:00

You've got to remember that when women give you this advice they're picturing the man they are attracted to.

JBY works if you're Brad Pitt or any other high status person. Women will always conform to the guy they're fucking, not the other way around.

Edit: Thank you for the gold whoever you are, my red-pilled brother!

Varrian · 2014-04-09T09:55:28+00:00

Do not judge a women by what she says but what she does.

Do not hold women to the same standards as men.

vengefully_yours · 2014-04-09T13:59:30+00:00

I'm going to go against the grain and suggest that there may be a kernel of truth there. Don't waste your life trying to be a basketball star if you're 5'7" and uncoordinated as fuck, (like me). Find what your strengths are and develop them. Be the best version of yourself. This is where the Masculine (get better) and the Feminine (be yourself) can dovetail. The masculine says always get better never be satisfied with where you are and the feminine says don't waste your time trying to get better at something you're not made for or that you don't enjoy.

Obviously I understand most of the guys here are rebelling against the feminine mindset and will prefer to reject it outright and that's fine. We're men, so masculine comes first. Especially when so few of us even know how to work hard or stay on task.

JP_Whoregan · 2014-04-09T21:40:06+00:00

Guys, think about it: JUST BE YOURSELF is women telling us EXACTLY WHAT THEY WANT US TO DO, and it's 100% beneficial to THEM and rarely beneficial to US.

It's the ultimate in pre-selection if we "just be ourselves."

That way:

Neckbeards will be neck beards, weaklings will be weaklings, awkward idiots will be awkward idiots, supplicating beta orbiters will be supplicating beta orbiters and..........wait for it..........

Alphas will be Alphas.

Women don't want men who "demonstrate" higher value; their ultimate goal is to find men who ARE higher value by nature. They don't like the disappointment of finding out that the guy with the nice muscles at the bar might also live in his mom's basement and have no job. They don't like the idea that the guy who spits great game and dresses nice might actually be, deep down, a supplicating beta pussy.

They're telling us to help them in their own methods of preselection" when they say "Just be yourself!". It's how they can take the 20% of men they're willing to fuck, and WEED THAT GROUP DOWN FURTHER to find the "cream of the crop", if you will.

JBY advice is women trying to find THEIR version of a "unicorn", a perfect, studly alpha with a great job, washboard abs, model good looks, a nice car, the highest level of social proof, all combined with that alpha wanting a nice marriage/LTR who will give her a Disney wedding and a princess lifestyle.

When you really think about it, anytime a man takes JBY advice to heart, he's basically acquiescing to women's desires to excusing himself right out of the SMP, so the pretty little princess won't have to bother with being "creeped" out by him or having to deal with his unwanted pick-up attempts and come-ons. Why? Because the man will just be "being himself", the "himself" he was trained to be since he was a kid, with all of his shy, reserved mannerisms, pathetic pedestalizing, fawning, and gift buying. By just "being himself", it allows a woman to MUCH QUICKER get to the stage of "Aha! Beta pussy! Gifts galore from the friend zone starts today! But ugh, I'm not fucking HIM, because that would be creepy."

Game, DHV, social proof, and self improvement only makes it more complicated for their hamsters to do the sorting.

c00kme · 2014-04-09T10:57:22+00:00

If I may chime in on this.

I am a 34 yo male with borderline personality disorder.

All my life I struggled getting girls (and still do); my looks are average, I dress properly (now more so), I dont lift for health reasons but I try to stick to a reasonable diet plan.

As you know a trait of BPD is a chronic fear of abandonment; that leads to one become a sort of "chameleon" to attract people; that is, playing roles.

I have played many roles, and still do, its compulsive, often I can't help it. It leads to great bouts of depression and anxiety.

So yeah I have tried the "dont be yourself" advice, doesn't really work; no matter if I try to play the jerk, the nice guy, the tough guy whatever. Doesn't WORK. It might work if I were skilled enough at acting but I am not a professional actor and pretending actually causes great emotional pain and loneliness in the end.

What I am now trying to do is to actually be "myself" undo all that conditioning where I try to please people by being X or Y. It works if I can stop overthinking my interactions for a minute and yes I guess thats what women may actually mean by "be yourself"; that is, be in the zone enough to not give a fuck. The "dont be yourself" advice does the exact opposite (at least in my case) and makes me uptight and incongruent.

Amusingly enough, I pulled more girls when I was my honest artsy/emo self than when I tried to be the player, jerk, tough guy whatever.

I have been lurking TRP for a while. Tthe theory on there is interesting from an evolutionary psychology point of view, but in my case I find it hardly translates to actual results.

Also as a mgtow-ish I find it amusing in any case that the advice to be more "alpha" is "dont be yourself" at the end of the day you are still bending over backwards to appeal to women.

TL;DR: "Just be someone else" doesn't work. "Be yourself" probably means something different than what you think it means...

Aughin · 2014-04-09T10:53:51+00:00

What is you and yourself is really different from what the matriarchal conditioning of 18 years which almost every person goes through is.

You know, the one that makes boys kill themselves when their gf breaks up. The one that make boys being ashamed of the natural rush they get of seeing superiorly proportioned naked bodies in porn. The conditioning that makes your body tremble with fear of rejection when approaching women.

If you had the results in hand on everything that was forced on you and is NOT your nature. It would get decades to get rid of every bad habit. But when everything that women ever forced on men is gone that's when you will be irresistible to women.

smokingmonkey420 · 2014-04-09T12:11:27+00:00

You have to be yourself. You can't be someone else. So when you try to be someone else, you're just setting yourself up for failure.

Here's the thing. You get to decide just who you are. You decide your attitude and outlook in life every day. You being the best you is that all you can ask for.

I always see this advice on this site and it makes no sense. You're essentially saying the same thing as I am, but adding on a caveat that's impossible to reach.

Just be yourself and continue to improve everyday.

Blue942 · 2014-04-09T13:46:02+00:00

Quick question. Why is it bad to JBY? Aren't you supposed to be just that all the time, but in Alpha mode?

UnclePuma · 2014-04-13T17:19:24+00:00

"Just be yourself" - Nope.

There was a time when I worked at a convenience store and it was boring. I interacted with people all day err day including some fine ladies, but I was just a cashier and behind that I was me, and I didn't normally talk to people as much as I was forced to.

So I decided one day to see what it would be like to be confident. You see people came in in varying moods, and while I could be amicable not everyone would see my friendliness positively especially if they were having a bad day or simply because they didn't like me to the very core.

But I didn't have time to dwell, not while I was confident, for so many came and went that dwelling on the rude customers simply distracted from my friendliness.

Then the next day, I made up a tall tale of my past and told it to as many people as I could, too pass the time.

Then the next day I wore glasses and told people was I near sighted.

And then girls started to really get into the conversations I was having with them even if at first they started on the topic of the brand of juice they were buying.

My point. I made believe I was someone else, with their traits, and those traits were based on the mannerisms of customers I had enjoyed interacting with. And afterwards I realized acting mein acting.

Anecdote: A women (older) comes in decides to buy some item, then upon checking out decides against it. She asks me, can I leave this here? You'll put it back for me right? :)

My response: :) Nope, but I'll wait here for you while you go and put it back. Go on I'll wait. :)

Her response: Well someones bossy today ;)

Mine: That's right, now you go on and put that back. mkay?

Point is, get a job in retail. You'll be forced to learn human interaction.

Title	Just Be Yourself
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	44
Comments	17
Date	April 9, 2014 7:49 AM UTC (12 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/TheRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/22lb7x/just_be_yourself/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/TheRedPill/just-be-yourself.13792 https://theredarchive.com/post/13792

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