Problem holding frame/confidence

Wolf_A · 2014-12-20T03:48:02+00:00

Sometimes I can tell and feel when women are shit testing me, and I say the correct things, but I get nervous and my tone and body language depicts that.

That's probably because you're giving more than a shit to what women think of you. Once you give no fucks to their thoughts everything will be much clearer in the mind.

Sometimes when I talk to clients over the phone, and they try to get me to validate myself to them and intermediate me, I know what they're trying to do, and I know how to respond, but I don't know why I get nervous.

In this case you should definitely give more than a shit. Read more on powertalk in the sidebar (under 'required theory reading') to get through general shittests.

[deleted] · 2014-12-20T03:45:30+00:00

Get angry and annoyed, but don't show it. Anger is a good replacement emotion.

I_HaveAHat · 2014-12-20T04:36:44+00:00

Theres probably not going to be any answer here that will help you. You gotta find the true problem for yourself, then search for your own answer.

therellikofthenight · 2014-12-20T05:21:56+00:00

Picture the girl moaning as she's being pounded from behind. Seriously.

OakTr3E · 2014-12-20T16:40:42+00:00

It might be that you don't have enough positive experiences to truly believe you are worthy of not taking shit.

It takes time to rewire the brain from

"I am a useless beta faggot who don't deserve positive experiences or going for what I want."

to

"This is my life and my reality. Noone else deserves to dictate how I should live life or have any sort of unfounded authority over me".

If you are consistently practicing RP. Going out of your comfort zone for a purpose (to improve yourself in areas that are important to you), then when you fail less often and get positive feedback, thats when it gets easier to hold frame and be outcome independent (and nervousness will diminish). She slapped you for suggesting a threesome when you accidentally bumped into your ex? That´s hilarious, not awkward! She must really like you if she got that upset of the thought of you desiring someone else ;)

Most things can be seen in a positive light and hell, the universe is expanding and entropy is unavoidable. Why bother what people think of you? You are here for a brief moment in time and you will never again have this opportunity to enjoy the ride.

Just keep on pushing your limits and in time you will get there. Accept your nervousness when it arises. Don't make a big deal about it. You are not supposed to succeed instantly the moment you have swallowed the pill.

oldredder · 2014-12-20T05:33:36+00:00

1) lack of experience outside of work for doing this

2) you have 2 frames: 1 for work, 1 different for non-work and that non-work frame is weak. In which case you need to do more than hold frame, you need to build it from experience, suffering, case by case situations. Once you've built it you can hold it. You've already built it for work, for clients.

InSearchofOMG · 2014-12-21T02:18:45+00:00

What I'm about to say is a running joke, but sounds like it actually may apply: do you lift? Strengthening your frame starts with the body.

Title	Problem holding frame/confidence
Author	randyquestions
Upvotes	5
Comments	7
Date	December 20, 2014 3:22 AM UTC (11 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/TheRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/2puq48/problem_holding_frameconfidence/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/TheRedPill/problem-holding-frameconfidence.26684 https://theredarchive.com/post/26684

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