Authentic masculine expression comes from the harmonization of the three different ‘selves‘ which exist inside each man.

These three selves are the:

Physical Self

Mental Self

Spiritual Self

Like any tripod these legs are all independent of one another yet are entirely dependent on the supporting strength the other two provide.

If you are looking to live the most optimal of lives and achieve the greatest sense of physical strength, mental joy, and spiritual satisfaction, then each of these aspects to who you are as a man must be cultivated and a balance must be struck between them.

Have you seen the gurus who are entirely spiritual, yet would never be able to lift their fellow man if he were to fall as he simply does not have the strength?

What about the brilliant minds who can understand the most complex of formulas yet lack any ability to connect with those around them as they simply cannot tap into the spiritual connection which exists amongst all living things?

Lastly, have you seen the man who sculpts his body to replicate that of a Greek god yet he cannot tell you the last book he read or education he pursued?

These are simple stereotypes which I can find plenty of people who break the caricature, but you get my point. More often than naught, a man is exceptional in only one area or none at all.

So how do you develop these three different aspects of the ‘self’? How do you reach and maintain harmonious levels within your heart, mind, and soul?

You know the answer, it’s always the same.

Hard Work

You don’t just get the life that you want, you’ve got to work for it. Nobody is going to hand you anything, you aren’t just going to become more intelligent, healthier, or happier by willing it.

No, you’re going to have to make yourself uncomfortable and you’re going to have to do the things you’ve been putting off.

This is the entire premise of my book 31 Days to Masculinity. When I wrote that month long program the aim wasn’t to get men laid or help them reveal their six pack.

Instead, I focused on the entirety of the man to help him rebuild himself without the influence of a weaksauce society. Similar to the 21 Convention, I set the goal of helping men develop every aspect of who they were, developing the ‘Ideal’ man as Anthony Johnson puts it.

This is why the book sends each man on a different journey, what he has to do to get himself to optimal living if different than what you’ll have to do. Each journey is unique, but there are some universal overlaps and that is what this essay is about.

When you work to develop your physical, mental, and spiritual self you’ll find that the challenges you face, the pieces you find easier/more difficult, and final results are going to be entirely unique to you. Yet, the other men who also go through this transformation will understand exactly what you feel as they’ll of experienced the same thing, differently.

Physical

Without resistance, the body will not grow. Without putting stress on the body, you’ll never be able to appreciate the beauty of it nor will you ever know what it is capable of.

There are plenty of men out there who watch movies and think to themselves, if that happened to me I’d rise to occasion.

If you’re one of those guys, I’d like to ask you, why do you think you can do those things, have you practiced any of them? Have you put yourself in those situations in a training environment? Or, as is the case with most, you just assume you’ve got the natural skillsets to do what takes others years to achieve at the whim of fortune?

Our body adapts to the stress placed on it. I’m not going to tell you what it is that you must create with regards to programming as I know nothing about you. You’re reading my blog and are a man, that’s all I know at this moment.

Here is what I can tell you. Weight lifting and strength training as a whole are instrumental in an overall development of the physical self.

You must lift weights.

I don’t care what your program is, I don’t care if you choose to implement a mixed martial art or running, and I don’t care the frequency, intensity, or preference you may have. Lift weights, get active, and ensure that you’re putting your body in motion and that you’re recording your results so that you can look at trend analysis and adjust the programming accordingly for the most efficient means of training without injury.

Remember, you cannot ‘out exercise‘ a bad diet.

This means that you must pay considerably more attention to what it is that you’re putting into your body.

Proper nutritional programming is essential for sustained superior output. Again, I don’t give a shit what your diet looks like so long as you’re ensuring it is high quality and conducive to a healthy body. Your physical, mental and spiritual self are completely dependent upon what it is they are using for energy.

TL;DR: Put good fuel into your body.

Do not let focus on the food cause an oversight on the importance of the fluids you’re consuming. Water is essential, it is the only thing that you have to have, all else is optional. Some find supplementing their water with electrolytes or other vitamins helps keep the intake from feeling monotonous. It’s much easier to drink a gallon of water a day if you’re enjoying each sip.

It is this combination of proper stress, fuel, and hydration that you’ll crate your most optimal physical self, and each of those also plays into the health and capability of your mental self.

Mental

It seems to me that the majority of men out there know that their minds are in shambles, yet they have no fucking clue how to fix it. So they add more to it, create more stuff, and fill it with more thinking that they’re lacking in something.

Gentlemen, I will tell you now, you do not need more, you need less.

In order to reach the greatest heights and develop the strongest mental ‘self’ you can, you’ve got to remove the unessential. Get rid of the shit that is clogging up your daily life. Not just inside your head, but the environment in which your head spends its time as well.

There is a reason I deleted my Facebook.

I could make more $$$ if I went onto that platform with TFA, but there is no fucking way because Facebook bogs my mind down. Seeing people ‘act‘ happy, while living miserable lives was driving me insane. Instead of keeping fakebook to stay in touch with my Navy brothers across the country, I just deleted it.

What’s the point?

I chose facebook as my example because that is what a lot of people find themselves getting caught up on.

You’re watching other people do shit and comparing your life to theirs and it is absolutely detrimental to your mental well-being.

It doesn’t have to be facebook though, your mental clutter could be:

  1. Seeking approval from your parents.
  2. Keeping the wife happy
  3. Playing it ‘safe‘ and doing what you’re “supposed” to do
  4. Keeping up with the Jones’s
  5. Trying to control things you have no control over
  6. Giving Time Vampires your most valuable resource – Your Time
  7. Confusing accumulation of ‘stuff‘ as accumulation of happiness
  8. Identifying with MSM or Politics
  9. Avoiding confrontation with who you are vs who you want to be
  10. Living in the mold created by society

Each of these things plagues plugged-in men in society, some more than others. The fact is, until you tackle whatever issues you’ve built in your mind, you’ll never achieve the optimal level of mental health.

I’m not happy all of the time, but I’m a happy dude. I’m happy because there is no clutter in my mind anymore.

How did I reach this point?

I faced my demons head on

Not only did I go through and delete people, things, stuff from my life which I did not find value, but I also removed physical pieces of ‘stuff’ from my home.

If there is clutter in your bedroom, how can you sleep peacefully?

If your writing area is a mess, how can you remain focused when writing?

If your living room looks like it came from a magazine, how can you say it represents who you are as a man?

Read the entire Piece at The Family Alpha: https://thefamilyalpha.com/2017/10/13/the-trident-of-masculinity/

I’m more active on Twitter than Reddit: https://twitter.com/TheFamilyAlpha