What's the point?

theubercuber · 2013-08-06T00:37:16+00:00

how can I be a great wife, wonderful mother, and a financially successful business owner at the same time?

I hate to break it to you, but you almost certainly can't.

To rise to the top in business, law, etc. takes everything you have (unless you are very lucky). Recently there was an article by a feminist lawyer where she lamented that she was unable to head the firm due to her family needs. Her solution? Make the top tier jobs have easier requirements so women can do them too. Even if this happens in corporate America, as a business owner you don't have that option.

If a family is a huge priority to you, and you want to have healthy, well adjusted kids, that will necessarily take away from your capacity as a businesswoman.

Just like men who choose to spend their whole lives away from their families, you cannot have it all. You have the freedom to choose, but a choice must be made.

UnpluggedMaestro · 2013-08-06T02:44:02+00:00

Just have the kids, start a family, and when your time slowly starts opening up you can explore business options.

What's the difference between starting a business RIGHTNOW and starting it 5-15 years from now? If it's not utilizing new technology to disrupt a market and it's just a lifestyle business idea (let's say a bakery, since you said you're a baker) starting your business is not time sensitive.

Your body, however, IS time sensitive.

Is your boyfriend husband material? If so, and he can support you, starting a family with financial stability is quite a rarity these days, and you shouldn't piss it away because you want to do something simple like start a business, which will ALWAYS be there.

Shit, you can even take your spare time and learn all the ins and outs of business while you raise a family, and by the time you finally get to put the time and resources into it you'll be a business badass.

realniggasstandup · 2013-08-06T00:09:12+00:00

You've probably been fed lesbian propaganda your entire life about "having it all." The reality is you can't have it all and your priorities over desires. Raising healthy children is a priority and should trump careerist desires. If you like baking, do it at home, or take a part time job once the kids are in school.

SupALupRT · 2013-08-06T01:18:46+00:00

Here are your options:

Happy marriage
Fulfilling family life w kids
Successful career

Pick two.

2013-08-06T04:55:43+00:00

You are just repeating the feminist mantra. Men are told very early in life that they cannot have everything they want. Typically, they are told that they will have to work their ass off supporting a family. They cannot take care of the kids or spend too much time playing with them, in fact if a man is nice to a kid, feminists will raise their eyebrows and wonder if he is a pedophile/rapist (I run away from little kids like the plague if they approach me).

You cannot do everything. You have to choose what you value the most and focus on that. Here are some things to keep in mind:

1) Your husband's goals might not be the same as yours. Also, keep in mind that you are a team. Feminists want you to be able to do everything, but too much redundancy and no specialization does not make a good team.

2) Your fertility has a clock attached to it and your body's ability to repair itself deteriorates over time. When a 30 year old pro athlete suffers a major injury, his/her career is over because he/she cannot heal like a 20 year old can. Pregnancy is typically worse than any major sports injury. A lot of 18 year old girls who have babies recover quickly and look like they've never been pregnant before. Biologically, there are a lot of advantages to having kids at a younger age, for both you and the baby. Yes this sucks, but we tell the uncomfortable truth here.

3) Do you want to be financially independent or do you want to be a business owner? Being a business owner is hard. Most millionaires actually make their money through passive investments (i.e. common stocks in large corporations or real estate). I used to want to start a business, but I then I realized I would be far more happy being a passive owner of businesses and having more free time. Most college students are completely clueless about investing, business, or finance (even the people who major in business or finance, they are trained for the corporate jobs), you might want to figure out if you actually want to start a business or not first. Being a business owner arguably makes you less financially independent than someone with a well diversified portfolio of investments, as you are subject to individual risks (ex: the local economy going bad, business trends changing, etc). You certainly cannot take a break from your business and expect it to run itself, for the most part you are "all in".

Pussy_Galore_ · 2013-08-06T00:59:43+00:00

[permanently deleted]

dropit_sphere · 2013-08-05T23:33:00+00:00

a) there is a point to life

b)hard choices. No one here can make them for you. What do you want to hear?

An RP party line of "Get in the kitchen!"?
A pragmatic but ultimately unsatisfactory explanation of how to juggle it all? (Kids working in bakeries their mothers own is hardly the worst thing that could happen to them. Also, kids are limited by your fertility, while baking is not)
Someone to point out that no human being is able to do all of these, and that that's why splitting the workload between two humans is a great idea?
A sciency caution to you both that your sex life may take a downturn if he washes too many dishes to free you up for the bakery?

However you tackle all of this, I wish you the best of luck.

AnasRexGottfried · 2013-08-06T02:12:00+00:00

You'll be fine, the reality is you're probably going to have to put your aspirations of owning a business on hold to start your family, it's only the first 6 years or so of a kids life that really needs his/her mother full time, then it's time for them to go off and learn to become independent beings. Plenty of us see good women for more than just mothers. More importantly, why are you wasting your time majoring in math and philosophy when you want to be a baker? Why aren't you at the minimum working in a bakery, or taking business courses, learning about managing small businesses, local ordnances, etc.?

QualityControlled · 2013-08-06T00:31:10+00:00

Life is choices. You choose and you hope for the best.

All RP reminds you of is that there are certain constraints on your choices: Having children gets harder the older you get. You don't necessarily have to choose between children and being an entrepreneur, but it's going to be fkn hard, and it may not be the best thing for your children or your career.

What you are looking for with this post is more information on your options. You're not going to get much. I suggest making a list of pros and cons for each. Imagine each year from now until you're 40: what are you going to be doing each year under the different scenarios?

2013-08-06T07:21:42+00:00

I disagree with the people who say you cannot have a family and a career. You can. But you will have to be patient, make sacrifices, and work harder.

Think about it.

If you have children, do you really need to be there 100% of the time micromanaging every aspect of their lives? If you want, you can ship them off to public school when they are 5 years old. How many do you plan on having? If you have them relatively close together, like a year or two apart, and if you only have two or three, you are looking at most a 9 year commitment to time intensive parenting. As children mature, they require less work, as they get homework and recreation to occupy them. In any case, you and your husband can divided the workload. If you don't like public school, you can home-school them. Teach them to read, and to be self-directed, and pretty soon they'll be running their own lives. Home-schooled children, assuming they don't get some cult snake-handler curriculum, often wind up becoming better adults than their public school peers.

Also, you can have children, be the breadwinner, and let your husband take care of them while they are growing up, assuming he's amenable to that. But you can't look down on him for doing essential work.

One of the biggest mental errors made by Americans is the denigration of what is referred to derisively as "housework." As if feeding, cleaning, foraging, and running a household properly. It's not, assuming you do it correctly. It requires thought, planning, and discipline. Somehow it's acceptable for women to do it, although some careerist women look down on housewives, but if men do it, well then, they're just giant manginas!

As for your career, you can write and do research from home via the Internet. You can publish articles, books, etc. You can start an online business. My grandmother who came of age during the Depression taught violin lessons for years and kept her own money separate. My mother, who worked in advertising, put her career on hold until we were adolescents, then went back to school, got a Master's degree, and now teaches ESL and writes books. She could have done more of this when she was younger, but she didn't manage her time well, and would let herself get overwhelmed.

The thing is, if you want to do these things you cannot also want an easy life. Your life will be hectic, stressful, but perhaps rewarding if you can figure out how to stay healthy and decompress when needed.

I say go for it.

NakedAndBehindYou · 2013-08-06T19:21:10+00:00

how can I have everything I want in life without having to make any sacrifices?

Umm hello, you can't. Welcome to the real world.

Talkshitgethit · 2013-08-06T00:20:12+00:00

I'm gonna tell you right now, once you have kids, everything else is on hold. If you can get your business up and running before you have kids, then do it. Unless you want to start your business when you're in your 40's and older, but I get the feeling you don't want to do that.

2013-08-06T01:19:57+00:00

You really can't do it all, or at the very least you'll have to half-ass each goal. You're going to have to make some choices. Also,

I guess my question is what's the point in living if my only real goal in life is to have and take care of kids?

If you go the kids route, I doubt you'll be thinking "it's pointless" once you see them for the first time. They will become your purpose.

2013-08-06T08:32:36+00:00

how can I be a great wife, wonderful mother, and a financially successful business owner at the same time? It seems like it's impossible... Is there even a point to life?

How spoiled are you, to think that a life that isn't absolutely fairy-tale perfect is pointless? That's some serious Dudley Dursley shit. Life is not about perfect.

The perfect is the enemy of the good. You can spend your life miserable and bitter over what you don't have... but if you do you'll never notice that what you do have is pretty awesome. Learn to appreciate the good in life and strive to make it even better while accepting that nothing is ever "perfect".

As other posters here have said, you can't have everything. If you work hard, you can have a lot. Even if you just coast, you can still have things pretty good. But if you start pondering the meaninglessness of existence every time a cloud passes in front of the sun then your choices are constant disappointment or suicide.

From where you are right now, the point of life is to grow the fuck up and learn to live in the real world where things could always be better but that doesn't mean they're not good.

soapjackal · 2013-08-07T00:48:58+00:00

Timing. Is there any reason once a few kids have left the roost that you couldn't start a business?

Title	What's the point?
Author	Pussy_Galore_
Upvotes	4
Comments	32
Date	August 5, 2013 11:20 PM UTC (12 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/TheRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/1jrvnj/whats_the_point/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/TheRedPill/whats-the-point.6110 https://theredarchive.com/post/6110

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