When you're out alone; how do you maintain frame, exude confidence, and be alpha?

Archwinger · 2014-05-01T20:12:09+00:00

Men are not afraid of strangers. Men have conversations with strangers all the time. Men do not fear rejection, because there is one you, and an unlimited number of strangers to talk to.

When you confidently approach a stranger and start talking, the stranger is worrying about what you think and how to impress you. Not wondering why the hell you dared to walk up and say hello. But even if that stranger was, so what? You get blown off and talk to someone else.

You don't need an excuse or reason to talk to people in a public gathering place. Just say hi. Look good, be well-read, having interesting hobbies and useful skills, talk about interesting shit that isn't weird.

This isn't really anything specific about picking up girls or "being alpha." This is really basic, 101-level stuff about how to function and be a human being. The ability to have a brief conversational exchange with strangers without wetting your pants due to fear of rejection is a necessary skill to have to be an adult.

Wolfwoodd · 2014-05-01T20:44:12+00:00

This pretty much sums it up

jerdo · 2014-05-01T20:41:50+00:00

As someone who moved to a new country with a different language a few months ago and has gone out alone as a result I can offer you two ideas on this issue.

Build a social circle by meeting other guys through activities or work. Playing sports, joining groups, frequenting "hip" spots like the same cafes or lunch spots in the day time you can meet other "regulars." Seeing a fellow customer on multiple occasions makes it easier to strike up a conversation and you can steer the conversation towards your situation of being new in town. I cannot stress the power of becoming a regular at places. being on first name basis with bartenders, coffee shop employees, gym employees, etc. will give you good social proof. These people are basically obliged to have basic conversations with you so chat them up.
Maintaining your frame when out alone is really no different than with buddies, it's just a little harder to build social proof and to move between groups ie. filling the time you aren't "running game." In the past I have been both totally forthright and said "i'm here alone I just moved here and don't know many people yet when walking by I thought this place looked fun, cool, bumping', etc." (This can be alpha as FUCK if you have god convo skills and are a relatively "cool guy") and I've also lied with a version of "I can't find my buddy, have you seen a guy wearing...?

But realistically if you're not a total weirdo the fact that you're new in town and you're out alone talking to people demonstrates more than enough confidence. From my experience I don't recommend your frame to be "I'm looking to meet new friends" instead make your frame about being a cool guy and getting experiences. An example would be steering the conversation towards something you want to do and asking them if they know how to get involved in it. "In my last town I played on a rec hockey team. Do you guys know anyone who plays or how to join a team." "I'm looking to join a gym here, where do you guys go/ wheres the best place to go." "are there any good jogging paths around here" whatever you're into.

Hope this helps, its a tough situation but it helped me to think of how much I was growing as a person and entering into a small percent of people that actually leave their comfort zones regularly.

Blood_Vaults · 2014-05-01T22:44:46+00:00

Don't have to worry about acting alpha and constantly making sure I'm maintaining frame because I'm a carnivore true and true. I know I am. It's just like breathing.

Title	When you're out alone; how do you maintain frame, exude confidence, and be alpha?
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	12
Comments	9
Date	May 1, 2014 8:03 PM UTC (12 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/TheRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/24he8j/when_youre_out_alone_how_do_you_maintain_frame/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/TheRedPill/when-youre-out-alone-how-do-you-maintain-frame.14883 https://theredarchive.com/post/14883

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