Found an original Tinder profile!!! 🙄

AngryCockOfJustice · 2019-09-23T04:34:10+00:00

honeymoon phase: I like men in charge

fast forward a few years: muh....you're abusive, domestic violence, Duluth model, Instagram and Twitter posts about abusive men, cheating because she was feeling neglected and she goes back in dating market telling next idiot in line how "abusive and disrespectful" her ex was.

hamarr47 · 2019-09-23T03:22:14+00:00

I love the “be original” after a profile that looks like it was copy pasted from sort of template that everyone uses.

where_muh_good_mens · 2019-09-23T02:15:57+00:00

What, I'm guessing 35 or around there?! Sounds like an absolute horrid to deal with on a daily basis. Will be demanding and nagging if you don't do what and with how much splendor she needs from you. Wants a man to now commit to her and give up pumping and dumping all that pootang that wants the same exact man. Yeah right, what a delusional twat.

WereNotGonnaFakeIt · 2019-09-23T04:26:09+00:00

Wow, she likes hiking AND wine????????

cycloneous · 2019-09-23T03:25:47+00:00

I know what I want = It's taken me years on CC to figure out that Chad, Tyrone, Pookie, Ray Ray, Brad and Jamal won't commit to me!

I like men that take charge = You better know how to bend me over six ways to Sunday before confession

I am tall = You better have an unrealistic standard, otherwise, "you're out"

I like wine, travel, love last minute road trips = guess who is paying for all this, I'll give you a hint, it is not me!

where_muh_good_mens · 2019-09-23T02:22:51+00:00

Furthermore look at that last line. She is also demanding that this hypothetical man she envisioned/fantasized actually puts time and energy into chasing her used up bitchy ass. The audacity on this pickle tits over here with no understanding on what men are looking for or willing to do for someone in her position. She thinks she is at the top of the moon because she doesn't have kids. As if you can play the dark side off like it's just "a preference". Uhh huh. Everyone that isn't an entitled cum rag recognizes a woman's failure in not having kids. The simple fact she is "looking for something serious" after years of playing the field tells me she is starting to figure out her status is at the bottom of the totem pole, but overcompensating by artificially elevating herself as a prize worth chasing and keeping. No bitch, you are 'independent', no guy thinks of you anything more than a hump day lay.

CantBanFacts · 2019-09-23T11:29:18+00:00

knuckles crack OKAY!! Let's see if I can translate this into RealTalk ^{^{^TM}} :

I can't manage to fuck around anymore because I'm post wall so it's marriage time. I'm 5'7" but 5'9" sounds better and your height is more important than your character to me but you better not be shallow. I'm barren from too many drug induced miscarriages. I love expensive stuff and entertainment, and the opinion of my large canine will determine whether I will like you because I have no agency of my own. This is further reinforced by my desire to have a strong man lead me around though I present myself as strong and independent. If you notice this contradiction your'e a miss oh gin est. Though I have spewed this cookie cutter, basic bitch screed in an attempt to land a rich, buff, young, stud muffin that's light years out of my league, I require that you commit to writing a passage of literary mastery in order to complete my gina tingle.

WOOF! The sophistry of western women knows no bounds.

lorem6300118 · 2019-09-23T10:23:39+00:00

“Write something original”: dance, monkey!

You beta losers aren’t cold approaching me anymore, which is bad because I am addicted to free validation walking up to me and telling me how beautiful/amazing I am.

(I wonder why: surely there weren’t broad societal trends that massively disincentives daygame. Surely there can’t be unintended consequences, due to the fact that at least five men asked me out a day when I was 18 to 25, proving how eternally awesome and desirable I am.)

LULgetcanceranddie · 2019-09-23T13:06:06+00:00

"im a super cool aunt!" + "I love good wine"

bmt0019 · 2019-09-23T02:39:35+00:00

This profile just makes me want to run far away! Takes man repellent to a new level.

MaunaLoona · 2019-09-23T03:50:23+00:00

That's a big dog for a single woman. Who wants to bet the dog is more than just a pet?

FoxIslander · 2019-09-24T00:24:10+00:00

I know why women are on tinder, but I have no idea why men are.

redismyfuture · 2019-09-23T12:51:48+00:00

< I love camping, outdoor activities, I like to travel, and last minute road trips.

Wanna bet how many of these she actually does on her own???

I'm gonna with 0. Which means, she doesn't actually love these things, she just want YOU to entertain her with activities!

FirmFirefighter · 2019-09-24T17:25:57+00:00

starfish sex followed by mental abuse and false rape allegation. And my ugly canine friend sleeps in the bed.

JihadNinjaCowboy · 2019-09-23T12:08:57+00:00

Does any guy actually go on Tinder without any intention of just pumping and dumping? (Well, other than to get a good laugh)

NickTesla2018 · 2019-09-23T03:30:32+00:00

As original as another miracle baby or golden pussy. Gazillions of humans have been born already.

thenotoriousdougie · 2019-09-23T16:44:35+00:00

But is she 5’9” “in heels”?? And will only settle for a Chad who’s in the top 10% of the height distribution before even starting to weed guys out for things that actually matter??

Good_Old_Friend · 2019-09-23T09:08:27+00:00

AWALT. The only thing that is original is that there is no pic of suggestive body parts.

ImpassionedTachyon · 2019-09-23T11:38:33+00:00

A sizist with ticket's on herself. At least she's honest

astorstoicdude · 2019-09-23T12:29:19+00:00

I left swipe on self professed dog moms

Cynewald · 2019-09-24T18:00:18+00:00

"I'm sorry if you get on with my 65 pound dog Rocky Road, your only 5'10. Rocky could overpower you up but not a 6'1 man, he has no chance against a 6'1 man because 6'1 men are 16x stronger and a million times better than 5'10 men. My dad was a 5'11 short ass wimp, too. I don't know what my mum saw in him. Teehee"

Thetrvler · 2019-09-25T03:22:11+00:00

“Super cool aunt” usually equals alcoholic/mentally fucked up.

The crazy part is they think it makes them “cool” like the “cool aunt” on television shows.

Title	Found an original Tinder profile!!! 🙄
Author	mimiczx
Upvotes	190
Comments	45
Date	September 23, 2019 1:59 AM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen/comments/d800x8/found_an_original_tinder_profile/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen/found-an-original-tinder-profile.344069 https://theredarchive.com/post/344069

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