I need advice. I will try to make this short. I've been lurking for 9-10 months. Reading posts, sidebar, lifting, stfu-ing and got WAY better with shit tests. This resulted in more frequent and consistent sex. From rarely to 2-3/mounth. I am mostly fine with that amount. Quality has improved slightly, but there still a long way to go. BJs have not come back at all. It has actually been a few years now. She just won't do it. I used to talk about how I wanted that, but since everything else has been slowly improving I just figured that would come eventually. It hasn't. So 3 weeks ago, on my birthday, we were getting into it and I was in position. I told her to suck it and she yelled "no!" and nearly jumped out of bed. I repositioned myself on her, fucked for 20 seconds and finished, then handed her a towel very coldly. I did not do my usually laying next to her and trying to get affection attention or any other bullshit. She sensed my coldness and just wiped off and left the room. We haven't talked in the 3 weeks since. Ive have been sleeping in my kids room, where I was most of the time before that anyway. We have communicated very little via text and only about our kid. I don't want to come off as butthurt, but I don't want to tolerate her lack of effort or no BJs. She is not affectionate with me at all anymore. We are supposed to go to on a vacation for a few days next week. I really don't want to. I feel like telling her to go without me. She will be with other family. I know I need to get back to focusing on myself and my missions I just don't know where to go from here and advice on any of it would be appreciated. If I am coming off as a reactive bitch how do I end it? Meaning end the silence without looking like I'm being submissive. I'm pissed off that she won't blow me. I am a man that deserves and can get it, i guess I'm not there with her yet, which hurts.