Stats: 39 yo Male. 5'11" 168 lbs. married for 18 years to 36 yo wife 3 kids. Found/Following Red Pill for 5-6 months or so

Lifts: working out for a year. was 132lbs when started. current max for reps in pounds: Squat 225,hip thrust 205,Flat BB Bench 165, incline DB press 65 weighted pullups 45, overhead press 85lbs (recently added those in repertoire) various curls and tricep pulldowns etc...

Sidebar: read just about everything but WISNIFG, am going back for reread and note taking on all...

Career: after 7 years at company with only one pay raise, i let my bosses know i was leaving and was offered a sweet position and a more rewarding career change to a different dept. with more money 3 months ago.

Mental Health: had a major panic attack/anxiety episode over a year ago that provided the fire under my ass to finally Truly deal with my anxiety issues and lead me on to mission of true self improvement (Lifting has been a HUGE help with this). actively working on being more social again (i had become a mopey self-conscious hermit after quitting drinking 3 years ago...)

Marriage: wife is a good woman. was a virgin when we met,stays in shape is loving and affectionate for the most part. we get along great for the most part, though our marriage had become boring and routine. when libido finally came roaring back a year ago after being non-existent since having quit drinking, i dumbly wondered what happened to the spark in my marriage (infrequent,duty sex mostly, 2-3times per mo) this was also stoked by the shock of my stay at home wife of the last ten years deciding to go back to work for the first time in ten years because she was bored/wanted extra money/etc. etc. blue pill/nice guy/validation seeking mission to get my wife to have more sex with me kicked in hard. discovered The Rational Male, then Red Pill subreddit, devoured the reading list, went Rambo, damn near nuked my marriage (that whole kids with dynamite thing..) have recently more or less gotten over the anger phase, taken responsibility for the state of my life and marriage, and am working on slowing waaaay the fuck down, STFU.

i'm discovering that Red Pill education is more about unlearning the Blue pill programming and uncovering my natural masculinity that is already inherent, than becoming some imaginary ideal of who i think an alpha chad should be.

my mission: be the best i can be in all areas of my life. get out and experience life more, make life happen instead of sitting around waiting for it to happen. work on and feed my craft and passion(music/art). if wife wants to stick around, great, if no, then that's fine. will deal with that if and when it happens. either way: the stay plan is the same as the go plan.

TLDR: i still have much blue pill conditioning to undo. looking forward to actively participating on the forum