Becoming Greedy

trancedj · 2016-03-12T13:09:46+00:00

Aight man. I understand you've come along way from where you started. We all have. And we all have room to grow. Just reading between the lines it sounds like you're not comfortable being alone. You've got to overcome this. How? All I can offer you is to maybe try and find some hobbies. Or learn a skill. In fact, someone just wrote a post on TRP about this exact thing.

Also, it's cool to be able to dominate a conversation but realize this can backfire. I used to be that guy and can match wits with the best of them. Now, when I enter a group or a conversation I speak less. My presence and the way I carry myself speaks more about me than anything that comes from my mouth. Now when I speak people shut the fuck up and listen. Once you've learned the basics and start to internalize TRP you can walk into a room and your presence will command respect. Dominating conversation can be exhausting. Let others spin tales to amuse you.

As for the flake, fuck her. She should have no bearing on what you as a man are doing at this moment. Focus less on women and more on what YOU want to do with your time and energy. Women will come and go out of your life. They should be a compliment to your experience, not the focus.

Hope that helps. And remember, when you start to master your own life, come back here when you can to help your fellow bros lift themselves out of their own shit. Good luck dude.

fastgrowth · 2016-03-12T18:02:24+00:00

When you started you were plateaued, horizontal movement, skipping from one thing to another. Now you're moving vertically, trying to improve on your current situation, get better girls, take them faster to bed, this is why you feel discontented, you know that even if you're pretty good right now,you feel there's room for improvement in your life, so you want to move even further vertically. As soon as you're really satisfied with your new situation (which maybe might never happen) you might plateau and feel satisfied again, but if you were to compare your weed smoking situation with the new situation, you'll notice that the latter is much better. (and truth be said, if you were really satisfied when you were playing video games you wouldn't have searched for TRP).

harkrank · 2016-03-12T13:26:58+00:00

You are under stimulated. Find something interesting and worthwhile to keep your mind of the girl who ditched you. Yes, socialize with male friends or do something challenging you've never done before.

TheRedStoic · 2016-03-12T13:35:49+00:00

When starting the date, go for the romantic greeting (kiss on either cheek, hands barely touching the shoulders, not imposing) sets a standard of physical contact. It can be the difference between the friends making it too awkward or not to end with a lip lock. After are, you are a physical creature. Also, it's a great way to let the hand slide to the small of the back to steer her towards the first destination for a moment, and sets a standard of contact.

On the boredom, yeah. That's part of the cycle. You will get bored because you're not doing anything new, or challenging. Maybe both. You sound very much like you're in a routine, in a comment you mention your hobbies, are you switching them out or trying new things? Monotony murders the mind

So you're in a new location, no Bros, that's perfect, reinvent and reinvigorate. Try new things you haven't before which scare and challenge you. The quickest way to make new bro friends is to get involved and pick a few as mentor types. Every done ultimate Frisbee? Rugbee? Ballroom or swing dancing? Check local events, Google is your friend. Join a sub for your location, use meet up. You'll find people quickly. Trust me.

You're doing awesome, but you need a change of pace internally to compensate for your regimented schedule. Build a new itinerary. Once a week you should do 3 hours in something new. Just hop, skip, jump to something truly new. You don't have to stay if you hate it!

Here's my last year's trials as an example, I do something new every 2 weeks. Minimum. I ditch most of it. (more like thrice per month, do you bro, you know your schedule)

Dancing lessons (mumba rumba salsa), dancing (Waltz or adv), Clubs (dancing), sororitslut parties, clubs (venue) Tennis, swimming (shore), yoga, swimming (closed), biking, rock climbing, book clubs, AA or NA mentoring, hiking (day), hiking (camping most often taken) hiking (trailer most often fatties), world building (rpg, pnp, avoiding personalities), lifting (equal to hiking day but the good ones aren't looking for approach), comedy clubs, book clubs, philosophy clubs, craft wine locale, craft beer locale, martial arts (strike based) extreme sports (think dirt track and moto, maybe bungee and para), cos play clubs (equal to book clubs but bunches of fatties), business (ingrained), martial arts (leverage based), business (enterprising), guns then everything else. (including trades, smithing, wood work etc)

TLDR: how do you refresh/invigorate/enjoy life? New experiences. That or you've got something clinical. (don't rule this out. Seasonal affective disorder could easilly explain your recent apathy) You've got this bro. Good luck and post some FRS with your new experiences!

shameless blast, https://drive.google.com/open?id=0B6YJEPGSOZ8ldlRFTlFkdE56R2M, learn your goals, your needs, and your stoic application

Frigzy · 2016-03-12T23:35:54+00:00

What I understand from reading your post is that you are using results as a means to validate yourself. Deep down you are still insecure.

Women like you? Your subconscious gets a happiness shot. You're rocking it in the gym? Your subconscious gets a happines shot. You excell at your hobbies? Same thing.

You sit at home without any significant progress? Your subconscious is in agony, crying out for a shot of validation, a shot of happiness. You feel empty and shallow without it.

Deep down you are not happy with who you are just for being... Well, just for being, period. You were like this when you started your journey and your constant and steady progress has been feeding your subconscious little teaspoons of happiness ever since. Now that progress isn't as clear cut and as frequent anymore, the old wound starts showing its ugly head again.

I think it's time to finally start healing that fucker. Some sort of monk mode for the subconscious if you will. Learn to love yourself. Learn to love being alive, just for the sake of being alive. After all, it's the most precious gift in the universe.

It's not easy, but it is possible.

PM-me-your-glutes · 2016-03-13T00:02:29+00:00

225 at 8%? Jesus dude if that's true I'm in awe. Do you compete?

Title	Becoming Greedy
Author	BeyondDedication
Upvotes	11
Comments	16
Date	March 12, 2016 11:31 AM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/4a3it5/becoming_greedy/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/becoming-greedy.161916 https://theredarchive.com/post/161916

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