Date question. Cancel or see it through?

SirAlphaFuxalot · 2015-11-12T21:41:54+00:00

needed "me" time, possible bs

If your gut is telling you it's possible bullshit, then it probably is bullshit.

Her actions are telling you that her time is more valuable than yours. You rescheduled twice to meet her time demands. Not exactly a power move on your part.

My advice is to wait. If she wants to meet and everything is cool, she'll text you. If she doesn't text you, then you flake and continue with no contact.

If, after you flake, she texts you and asks about the flake, brush it off with "something came up couldnt make it" or something else equally vague. If she asks why you didn't text her, say "I meant to but I forgot" or simply ignore it and continue no contact. After a couple weeks, if you want to then you can re-initiate contact. Act like nothing ever happened and start fresh.

The fact is, you need to make your time demands a priority. If you tell her a time and she can't make it, she gets one reschedule and after that if she can't make it you go no contact for a while. One way to make this slightly less stringent is to give her two options up front for different time periods i.e. "Hey I have some free time Tuesday evening or Thursday for lunch". She might legitimately not be able to make either of those times, but that's not your problem.

GraphicSeniorNudity · 2015-11-12T22:48:39+00:00

How did you handle the first reschedule? What was said, how easily did you reschedule?

This exchange frames the second exchange, and tells me/you want kind of ground you're standing on.

Act aloof, play it off as no big deal.

What does this mean? Rescheduling should be a big deal, it's your time, which is valuable. What isn't a big deal is spending that time with her. If your time is valuable, and you chose to spend it with her, she must be important. Tingles.

If your time is not valuable, you can easily reschedule whenever because, like, you don't care and stuff. That's not the attitude you want to project.

Johnny10toes · 2015-11-13T00:02:01+00:00

She canceled and said she needs "me" time or she rescheduled because of "me" time?

Sounds like she's got other options. No big deal but not to cancel for it.

BlackHeart89 · 2015-11-13T00:26:41+00:00

Unless you have something better to do, go on the date. If you're going to be buying her shit, don't go. Sounds like a waste of money. Unless you're doing it just to enjoy your stay.

Regardless of all that, don't put all your eggs into one basket or however the phrase goes. Continue looking for more women.

Title	Date question. Cancel or see it through?
Author	MofroShow
Upvotes	5
Comments	12
Date	November 12, 2015 9:18 PM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/3skxz7/date_question_cancel_or_see_it_through/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/date-question-cancel-or-see-it-through.156495 https://theredarchive.com/post/156495

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