Bros I have a seriously life and death exam in 35 days. I have practically not paid attention to it at all. I was constantly in a push pull situation with my mentally challenged ex. She frankly brought herself down with me. Recently she created huge drama and now long story short we haven't said it's over but the communication has stopped. I dont need closure or to tell or hear those words as I have started gaming other chicks. To be honest I am remembering the good times we shared and how she took care of me and was mindful of my well being. It's sad to know that there will be possibly no more phone calls or msgs. I slept with a way younger chick to get over it but that hasn't helped. Now I am gaming quite a few others too but it just doesn't feel the same.

My problem is even if I get momentarily highs they suddenly turn into lows. Everyday I just kill time until it's time to sleep. And even then I go to bed and get up wishing that the clock somehow magically turns back and we could avoid catastrophic failure where one event lead to another.

Currently I need advice to focus on my exam as if I don't make it, I am for all intents and purposes done. I will still have money earned over years but careerwise is over. I might be able to try next year but that's just a remote possibility considering I have already quit my job to read up for the exam. I feel like a deer in a headlight constantly thinking about things that happened with the ex and hoping we get back and desperately gaming other chicks so I could get them to sleep with me unable to take any action. I don't even like my recent plate anymore as her constant talking annoys me to the core.

I am trapped in a cycle of endless tomorrows. All I can do is just watch my life implode right before my eyes.

TL;DR- Trapped in an endless cycle of no being able to do anything . Help needed to get out of the rut