~ archived since 2018 ~

Fucking on the first date

lionofthejungle · 2015-11-29T20:53:48+00:00

This is something that I struggle with, and I'm hoping to get other people's opinions on this. When I meet a girl that I like, I ask her out for...

lionofthejungle

November 29, 2015

38 upvotes

/r/askTRP

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Post Information

Title	Fucking on the first date
Author	lionofthejungle
Upvotes	38
Comments	19
Date	November 29, 2015 8:53 PM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/3ura5i/fucking_on_the_first_date/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/fucking-on-the-first-date.142 https://theredarchive.com/post/142

Comments

[–]CisWhiteMaelstrom 7 points8 points9 points 10 years ago (12 children) | Copy Link

[–]NotReallyEthicalLOL 7 points7 points7 points 10 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–]wehadtosaydickety13 points14 points15 points 10 years ago [recovered] (4 children) | Copy Link

[–]NotReallyEthicalLOL 2 points2 points2 points 10 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–]wehadtosaydickety9 points10 points11 points 10 years ago [recovered] (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]speed3_freak2 points3 points4 points 10 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]NotReallyEthicalLOL1 point2 points3 points 10 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]lionofthejungle[S] 2 points3 points4 points 10 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]lionofthejungle[S] 1 point2 points3 points 10 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link

[–]CisWhiteMaelstrom 9 points10 points11 points 10 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

I'm not confident enough to lead like a man.

My dad says that when he was studying AI in grad school, one of the things they taught him was that the hardest decisions to make are the ones that truly do not matter. It just fucks with our ability to weigh options against each other. My observation with most men who aren't confident enough to lead is that they get tripped up over those difficult decisions. "What would you like to order order? Where should we eat? What movie should we watch?" type questions trip people up. Is that you're issue?

There's always small things here and there that I screw up during the date that I try to replay in my head after and learn from.

I think this is a very common problem with red pillers. We study perfect behavior and have a very elitist culture. It's easy to forget that most people do not put behavior under a lens like we do or demand the best. Red pill perfectionism is dangerous in that it trips people up under details, which breaks their game at a higher and more noticeable level. Make sure you don't succumb to that. Read the first section of this post.

I'm 6'0 tall and 160 lbs. You could say that I'm "in shape" but I feel like I could be more muscular.

I started TRP at 6'0 150 and still got laid. Keep lifting but know that your body isn't what's holding you back.

[–]lionofthejungle[S] 3 points4 points5 points 10 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

That's a good way to look at it. I just think there's such a huge emphasis on confidence, that it causes you to constantly keep score of the things you say and do, which in the grand scheme, probably don't matter as much.
You're right, it's usually the small stuff. For example, I accidentally spilled a bit of my drink on the table and when the waitress came by, I apologized for the mess. My date then said "That was your queue to ask for a napkin"...d'oh. It's just stupid things like that I over-think and leads me to believe that my level of attraction in her mind diminishes.
I agree. I have gotten laid, and it's not to say that a good body is the end-all-be-all because evidently, it's not; however, it's something that I just can't get out of my mind - almost as if I'm OCD about my body image as a man.

Thanks for your advice by the way. It really puts things into perspective.

[–]CisWhiteMaelstrom 1 point2 points3 points 10 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]NotReallyEthicalLOL0 points1 point2 points 10 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]NotReallyEthicalLOL31 points32 points33 points 10 years ago* (20 children) | Copy Link

[–]lionofthejungle[S] 2 points3 points4 points 10 years ago (19 children) | Copy Link

[–]wehadtosaydickety10 points11 points12 points 10 years ago (11 children) | Copy Link

[–]lionofthejungle[S] 1 point2 points3 points 10 years ago (10 children) | Copy Link

[–]Entrefut23 points24 points25 points 10 years ago (8 children) | Copy Link

Like everything else in seduction, it's done all at once. You get kino rolling from the start, you get mental attraction rolling from the start, you get the idea of her heading back to your place in her head FROM THE START.

That doesn't mean you tell her you're taking her back to your place at the end of the night to fuck her, because if you do that the date will end right there. This is where you being an interesting person comes in great handy. Me for instance, I was a barista while attending school, telling girls I make the best pre bed hangover cure isnt actually complete bullshit, because I used to do it all the time on nights where I'd go out drinking, then have to wake up at 4am to go to work.

You need to give her a good reason to come back to your place, that isn't sex, even though you both know that's where it might go. And it needs to come naturally. By that I mean it has to be something that's been escalating the entire date.

This is where getting her talking is very helpful. Find out what she likes, things that are comfortable to her. Does she like art? Well great you have an awesome painting you want her opinion on, which just so happens to be directly infront of your bed. This applies to all kinds of girls and all kinds of interests. It doesn't have to be something she necessarily participates in, it just has to be interesting. Asking some girls if they want to head to your place and pregame before you go out dancing is almost unfair, especially if your house is located directly next to the bar.

This one works wonders, because even if you don't escalate right then and there, she's already seen the inside of your place, so she knows you aren't a psycho. She is already comfortable with the idea of being at your place. Then throughout the night as you reference things about you, she might recall seeing them and will picture herself inside your place. As the conversation escalates to sex, that picture in her head moves to sex. Southpark wasn't joking about the whole theatre blowjob thing. Subliminal messages are very powerful tools when used correctly. Music is an amazing way to set that sort of mood as well. Wow you like so and so? I do too, I have a vinyl of such and such record, let's listen to it on my refurbished 80s record player.

One of my biggest mistakes I made bringing girls home when I first started dating was having a boring room. No posters, no books, no mma gear, nothing on display which hinted at me being interesting or high value. A nice set of knives with a cookbook conveniently left out, a mini bar with some sours and cheap cocktail makers, or maybe a half decent espresso machine, a record player, some suggestive artwork, whatever.

If the date can somehow start at your place, there's a good chance you can get it to end there if you play the cards right.

You need to find things like this that work for you. Just asking a girl to come back to your place for sex makes her feel like a slut on the first date. She shouldn't feel like a slut, until shes begging you to fuck her like one.

Just don't try and force it too much, this is usually why I like to know a little about the girl before I try and suggest things like this.

Hopefully that helped!

[–]lionofthejungle[S] 8 points9 points10 points 10 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link

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