So, I revived a former plate last December (first mistake). She flaked the summer prior after about 6 weeks, but managed to imply she was now seeing someone else. I shrugged and then told her ok, have a nice life!

After about 4 months, in December, I guess I had a pang of nostalgia and texted her out of the blue, and received a quick response. Within 2 weeks we were back to F-ing on a regular basis. At the time I had a few other good plates in the rotation, which was no small feat considering I have young kids 50% of the time. I assumed she would flake at some point, but instead she became even more interested and indicated interest to deepen our connection.

During the next 9 mos (more mistakes coming) she attended my kids b-days, had dinner with my mother, sister, and went on a few trips with me. She even got to the point to say she loved me. She then goes on vacation for a couple weeks in mid-August with her friends, comes back and I haven't seen her since she's been back (now over a week), even though we have a currently outstanding date planned for a show in 4 days - excuse after excuse about this or that over text.

I am assuming the next step is ghosting me altogether. I wouldn't think of it as anything more than that she found another branch, but considering how deeply she involved herself with my family and kids, its surprising me a bit. I texted her today, which may be for the last time assuming no response, asking her to meet me in a couple days. I fully expect a full ghosting by then.

Lesson learned -- women have no conscience to the damage they can inflict when swinging to the next branch. To be honest, I was developing feelings for this girl, even after dumping me the first time, but for some reason I keep developing oneitis with her even when I'm spinning plates.

How should I have approached this differently? Who is more damaged, she or I?

TL;DR: Getting ghosted again by plate; what should I have done differently?