Good indicators to know your LTR is cheating.

ThrowawayYAYAY2002 · 2021-04-13T21:23:40+00:00

Gut instinct is always a good one.

Will it be accurate every time? No. But it's still good enough.

New-approach · 2021-04-14T12:53:06+00:00

Surely this is more of a married man's TRP question. One day you will also come to see that it is also a bit of a beta question. Here is my experience:

New wardrobe, new hairstyle, new lingerie, new interest in personal appearance and in the tidiness of body hair - none of it for you.
Sudden secrecy - long time in toilet on the phone, rapidly puts phone down when you enter the room, repeatedly goes to the restaurant toilet when you are on a dinner date.
Late to bed, early to get up, leaves earlier for work - all of these create telephone opportunities for her.
Pours you a glass of wine, gives you a snack and kisses you goodnight with an apparently loving smile just as she is off to bed. Says she will be asleep as soon as her head hits the pillow. All these things are intended to keep you up. Feigns sleep when you go into the bedroom. However, you sometimes wake up in the middle of the night to find her masturbating.
Unexplained absences, unexpected delays at work, the weekly shop for groceries takes longer, close friends of hers that you only know by name have various dramatic "crises" that she feels she has to go round to lend emotional support for, team nights out at work.
New words enter her vocabulary, she develops subtle differences in the pronunciation of some words and in her general sentence structure.
Inability to not name her love interest repeatedly in supposedly totally "innocent" conversation. Presumably, this is because she can't help thinking of them the whole time.
Superficially nicer to you, but very defensive if you ask her any personal questions. Quick to attack you if she feels you have crossed the unrealistic privacy threshold that she set for herself in her own mind.
Money gets tighter in your joint current account. Next time you check it, you discover that every penny has been stripped from your savings account.
Sex gets noticeably better when it happens, but it doesn't really feel like it is for you.
You know something is going on but she flatly denies it whilst you can't find any hard evidence. During this time, she accuses you of all kinds of things, suggesting that you are paranoid, controlling and even mentally ill. She might even involve doctors. She will challenge aspects of your behaviour that are actually totally fine, to try and put you on the defensive. It will drive you totally crazy.
When you find the solid incontrovertible evidence you need that she is cheating, things will go ballistic. You will get no acknowledgement of anything, no explanation, no apology. In fact, there will be a very rapid smear campaign to totally discredit you whilst you are still trying to make sense of what on earth happened to your relationship. Even your closest family members will be subjected to this smear campaign and you can expect to loose nearly all of your friend/acquaintance network because the poor, weak and virtuous woman must always be right, mustn't she? You will get no opportunity to present an alternative account of anything because everyone will be satisfied that they heard the truth from your ex. She will subtly and strategically drag the children into it. etc, etc.

THEN.....

After a while you discover TRP and gradually begin to appreciate your personal role in the breakdown of the marriage through being the nice, considerate, unassuming and conventionally-successful guy your entire upbringing pushed you to become. Then you think about aspects of your life together that didn't make sense at the time, only to realise that these were other occasions when she was cheating on you. You start to experiment with various items in TRP toolkit and discover that they work. You extensively read the academic literature associated with the field of evolutionary psychology and discover an evidence base for many of TRP principles that academics have studied. You wake up to the innumerable idealisms in society and start to see through them. You get very successful with women and have the best possible (and previously unthinkable) sex of your entire life with multiple partners. You develop an unbreakable frame. You see all the tricks and nip things in the bud before they develop into anything at all. You enter and leave relationships on your terms. After you have pushed things far beyond what you actually find pleasurable, you calm down sexually. However, from this point on, you get multiple IOIs every day. The age of the women giving you IOIs gradually falls until most of them come from women in their low-20s, some of whom you follow up when you feel sufficiently interested. Men view you more favourably. You live a brilliant life on your own terms and you honestly no longer care what other people think. Your children work everything out for themselves and they really like the new you. In fact, you are by far the more stable parent and they gravitate towards you. This journey of genuine personal transformation takes about 4 to 5 years.

ONLY ALLOW YOURSELF TO BE KNOWINGLY CHEATED ON ONCE! Then learn what you need to from it and become a better man.

Thank you for the question. I am very pleased to have got that out of my system.

I have probably learnt all I need to from AskTRP now and will probably sign off. Thank you to the forum. It is time to get on with the rest of my life.

(PS. I recently asked another AskTRP member for more insights into the language of "femalish". This is because there is very much more that could be added to item 6 in the list above. Most TRP resources on "femalish" consider it in the context of female interest, shit tests and comfort tests. However, "femalish" in the context of female cheating appears to have been relatively overlooked by TRP community).

BetteMale · 2021-04-14T00:20:40+00:00

Can't cheat if she's not your girlfriend.

Grave_Heresy · 2021-04-14T01:04:15+00:00

Western female. All women cheat bro. Rules of the game.

lieutenantdong · 2021-04-14T10:18:22+00:00

Women are always shopping.

Your brain sees patterns and your mental periphery (instinct) will see patterns you cant quite articulate but you will get a feeling something is a miss.

That instict is built within us and is usually right. Yet most dudes treat women as little delicate flowers. If you're in this sub you should know women are programmed to seek higher value men.

guyandroadtovictory · 2021-04-14T14:44:41+00:00

phone upside down and near her, everywhere
emotional detachment
strange free time gaps between work, school etc.
accusing you of cheating (mirror effect)
FOG manipulations when you address issue with communication or subject that could bring up specific details
all of a sudden boost of new, sexy clothes, perfume, underwear
and the best - more interested in sex with LTR partner

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ass-thetics · 2021-04-14T10:21:31+00:00

When she's fucking another dude you know she's most likely cheating

Title	Good indicators to know your LTR is cheating.
Author	EmprOvMint
Upvotes	12
Comments	27
Date	April 13, 2021 9:22 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/mqbw4p/good-indicators-to-know-your-ltr-is-cheating/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/good-indicators-to-know-your-ltr-is-cheating.1598782 https://theredarchive.com/post/1598782

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