So while it seems a weird combination first, for me the self confidence package came without the self esteem part included.

I note this effect especially when seeing how guys with much less experience or background have a much higher self esteem than me.

Here I am stagnating! I give you a little background as others may find it useful as there are not much tips out there.

my work for self confidence

I pushed my confidence by exercising leaving the comfort zone, adrenalin sports, talking up strangers, travelling abroad and going out alone,......... I travelled many countries, studying at best unis, catched job out of uni at one of the largest company in the sector with a contract that wasnt given out within the last 5yrs, have friends all over the world, am socially popular,.... So I theoretically should know my value.

It was a lot of work, but maybe I cant squeeze self esteem out of it, because its an external stimulus and I am always depending on that. Just like with girls, I still value myself depending on her reaction - i try no to, but I see how much more I value myself only when it works and am angry that my game wasn't good enough to be one of those guys pulling that night.

self esteem

What works best currently for pushing self esteem short term is pulling girls - however you know that with a quote anywhere <50% that brings more problems than good and can be quite toxic. Annother option is to get admiration....

looking for help and advise

What is the equivalent of leaving comfort zone for self confidence, but for self esteem? It wont work with "just be it"/"no reason to not be it" - so I need some exercises please.