How to eject enemy from friend group?

[deleted] · 2014-06-15T22:52:57+00:00

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vandaalen · 2014-06-15T08:55:35+00:00

He is not an "alpha" inside the friend group, in the sense that he doesn't bring a lot of value to the group

The problem is, even though the rest of the friend group thinks he was in the wrong, they kind of just want to keep on living and not think about it.

I don't think you understood the whole concept of alpha really well. He is at least of a higher status than you if not even the AMOG.

I cannot continue to have this friend group if he is still in it.

You sound like whiny a AFC. Go and read the sidebar again.

Nerf_Circus · 2014-06-15T07:46:15+00:00

I had this problem. Just ignore his presense, it will be tough as the anger is fresh, but as time goes by you will never look at him the same again, and this will create tension in the group. If you friends like you more they will stick around you and the group will fracture slightly. Sticking with the ones you like, makes this easy to maintan then you just have to go on ignoring him when both half's of your social circle are together. That assume the social circle doesn't 100% ditch either party.

If your group is out together and people ask "why don't you talk to him" you can't go wrong. He can say "oh, well he took a joke the wrong way" but if they have been talking to you and you say he acted like an asshole they are more likely to believe that then you are holding a grudge from a prank.

drqxx · 2014-06-15T08:15:00+00:00

I would call him the fuck out let him know this isn't cool. You don't wanna be anywhere around him if he can't expect the "bros before hoes rule."

I may caution you this might make him want to fight you so be ready if he toes up with you strike first and strike hard.

I hope however he just avoids you.

[deleted] · 2014-06-15T13:58:47+00:00

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DevilishRogue · 2014-06-15T20:23:52+00:00

If you want him out make clear to your all of your friends that he is out. No more invites to him, no hanging out with him, he no longer exists. Presumably you have some mutual friends, that is going to be more awkward for you but you can either make it clear that he is not welcome when you meet or go full nuclear and say it's him or me. Personally I think you'll be disappointed with the results from the nuclear option so I'd recommend avoiding it. That said, it would also make it clear who your real friends are.

One final thing, this isn't TRP relevant. The advice you've been given elsewhere in response is the harsh medicine you need if you are to up your game and prevent this happening again. That's TRP. But you didn't ask about TRP, you asked about ditching a guy who is happy to fuck you over so that's what I answered in my first paragraph.

rp_manifesto · 2014-06-19T17:32:29+00:00

Maybe try learning from him. Seriously. The girl is gone, the guy obviously has some kind of game and is confident in his abilities. You could try to see past this, find a redeeming quality in him, and see what you can learn from him even just by observing what he does and how he does it.

Or you can go on some quest for vengence, learn nothing, possibly lose a social circle, and make yourself look like an insecure, whiny beta in the process.

Hyooge · 2014-06-15T10:43:37+00:00

Alright. Stop being a little bitch and thinking someone else is the problem. You are.

Problem:

He is better than you, you aren't admitting it and instead wish to shame him instead - to which he does not give a fuck.

Solution:

Do something that makes you better. Work on yourself instead of trying to drag someone down. He's ahead of you, so get to it and catch up.

Problem:

You think your friends care. You think they care about something so trivial. You're a man, no one cares, suck it up and make sure the time you spend with them is entertaining and fun. They didn't want to see you only for you to be miserable and ruin the mood. I wouldn't be surprised if you aren't invited next time.

Solution:

Enjoy your time out with your friends. Treat girls as though they are an accessory to your night and not the goal. You're upset about this girl and angry at the guy because she was your focus and he beat you to it. You have no right to be either of these things.

C'mon man, she slept with this guy, that doesn't make him a bad person but it does show that you weren't good enough for her. For the next girls you meet make sure you are good enough and get it into your head that girls are as replaceable as underwear.

RPthrowaway123 · 2014-06-15T07:23:37+00:00

Tricky shit my friend. I honestly don't know exactly what to do, as these sorts of interactions have always been tough for me too...I would say ignore him. Don't acknowledge him in group settings. Don't hate him, don't talk shit on him, don't call him out. Just pretend he doesn't exist and carry on with life. It'll piss him off that he can't get to you if nothing else.

If you really can't take it, find new friends. That's not the sort of thing a friend does, so find some new ones who value your friendship. This guy obviously doesn't.

The-Pussy-Whisperer · 2014-06-15T07:30:26+00:00

Make him into a beta

Title	How to eject enemy from friend group?
Author	Unexpected_Error
Upvotes	4
Comments	12
Date	June 15, 2014 6:00 AM UTC (12 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/286ork/how_to_eject_enemy_from_friend_group/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/how-to-eject-enemy-from-friend-group.140301 https://theredarchive.com/post/140301

Comments

I would call him the fuck out let him know this isn't cool. You don't wanna be anywhere around him if he can't expect the "bros before hoes rule."